Caregiving for a narcissist [I Want To Spread Narcissism Awareness]

@Cutiepi23 I feel for you, I grew up in a narcissistic "family" I was the only one who was not a narcissist and I was their target,I left "home" at 17 to get away from the abuse and eventually ended up at the other end of the world,I am a registerd nurse,my brother had the gall to ask me to come back to France to take care of our narcissistic mother (he was the golden child) while he lived next door to her,my sister who lived in Paris and did not have a dime to her name was not asked,I REFUSED and have never regretted it!

@berangere I know what its like to grow up in a dysfunctional family. I was the narsassists main target. Its a large family & the narsassit has full control. When I was young I always wanted to run away I left home at 20 as I wasnt allowed to leave before that. At the time I didnt realise just how bad it was & how it could get worse over the years. Ive had to keep my distance from most family members we all stay in the same town so not easy. But they all know I've stepped back from the family unit. Its been misery tbh.

@Cutiepi23 Sadly to keep your sanity and physical health no contacts with narcissists if at all possible is the only solution,they will never change,they will never accept you and start being kind to you,narcissists don't do that,they never admit they can be wrong and always put the blame on someone else,when I was younger my dream was to reconciliate with my family and have them accept me and admit they had been abusive towards me and regret it,but that never happened,I tried to reconcilliate myself with my narcissistic sister but had it all thrown back into my face and got abusive letters from her.Keeping away from them is the right thing to do,you have to take care of yourself and love yourself because they never will.

@berangere yes im limited contact to preserve some sanity.

@berangere I have had to do that too. I don't know about labels but I really feel the destructive selfishness and need to separate from it. It sucks but it would be worse if I didn't pull away. But egad the loneliness!!!

@Elevatorpitches Being lonely is far less destructive than living with a narcissist,being on your own you can finally find out who you are or reclaim who you are,reclaim all that the narcissist has taken away from you,it takes time and it hurts but you will get there and will be less likely to fall for another narcissist when you can recognise the red flags because you now know you cannot change a narcissist, you cannot make a toxic person non toxic.

@berangere Its the living that causes the loneliness (living with one of THEM!)!!

@Elevatorpitches Yes, one could not get any more lonely than living with a narcissist.

@berangere Trying hard to leave.

@Elevatorpitches I want to share that video with you,I find it empowering.Whether you choose to follow some of her programmes is up to you,but I posted it because her advise is very sound.

[youtube=https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ji761_xA_Pw]

@berangere All I wanna know is that I moved to the right place and can prevail there. THAT'S ALL!!!!!!

I moved IN with this narcissist because the place was available and I had to get off the road. Period.

@Elevatorpitches If you were not personally envolved with the natcissist,he or she was just sharing the place with you,then it will be easier to leave him or her behind,if he or she still bothers you or make threats I would alert the authority and get a AVO (apprehended violence order) against him or her.

@berangere The violence is negative, ie: I get ignored all the time, no connection in this house, and I have no connection with the neighbors or larger community...because of this.

I will be gone soon.

Not a codependency issue.

Just lack of money and personal direction.

@Elevatorpitches I wish you well,I hope you will soon find a solution,you need to reconnect with your surroundings and the world.

@berangere I need a reliable portable job that will pay me to stay inside or at least give me that option

@Elevatorpitches Cannot you find a job outside the house? The quicker you can save money and become financially independent the sooner you can leave.

@berangere I have a lot of trouble getting and staying ok with the jobs available to me. Its always been this way. Caused this housing disaster to begin with.

@Elevatorpitches I hope you can find something suitable soon and resolves this unpleasant situation,this is the only way.

@berangere Its been going on over 15 years now so me too!