I Have Epilepsy

I can't describe seizures that well, I'm not fully aware. The build up, or aura as they call it?, is something else!. But in a way?, it influences my everyday life I believe?.... An aura..these strange overwhelming feelings, butterflies in the stomach, some would witness hallucinations? but the main one I witness is deja vu. When everything resembles or reminds me of not just something ive seen or visited..but the full experience is pressured on me. Like all my senses pick up volume, and I end up right in a past experience..or place of familiarity. But I think it influences even lets say?, my everyday life and imagination?...if on a full scale I can see things so vividly like in the build up to seizures..let me explain the build up >>>....your walking through a local park and its raining...but its just a place with trees, people walking dogs and a river. But the aura intensifies ..the sound of a blackbird chirping and the rain falling through the trees..begins to sound like drops hitting of a large canopy and birds of paradise chirping...and you hear the waterfall in the distance..your senses lift...you're taking in everything from the smell of plants to the buzzing of bees...But its deja vu...maybe something you watched as a child or visited on field trip years ago...then the seizure hits! because you can't control familiarity, anything will remind you of some detailed experience, which is a good source for imagination...but all I'm saying is it can take you to the extreme..like you're imagination is let loose...and even in my everyday..I think there's a little bit there..because ive witnessed so many auras...but even mildly (like not during seizures) im seeing things in detail, and overwhelming in a good way...like imagination through a childs eyes almost, but it opens up space for creativity, and maybe I overrate things,...I pick up on on so much within an environment that it takes me by storm!..no matter how insignificant...and yes...creativity might be enhanced through epilepsy too?...seen as I believe imagination definitely has.....there is a book on Temporal Lobe Epilepsy called "Surviving Wonderland".....That it is! x
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