I'm pretty sad

Last night I had a pretty bad mental health episode. The last one was on Halloween. I thought I was doing pretty well but then I just had a really rough time yesterday. Whenever I have an episode the next day I'm always so drained and that's where I'm at right now. I just want to lay in bed and rot basically. I need to do chores today but I have no energy. I know I'll get it done today I'm just so not in a good place right now. Mental illness is really hard and I'm sad. Whenever I have an episode I feel like a little girl so out of control. It's so frustrating. I've been to therapy and even DBT counseling and I learned a lot of methods and it has been better over the years but whenever I have an episode I feel like such a failure. I know these feelings will pass but I'm just so tired of feeling so out of control of myself. I keep having nightmares and I think the lack of sleep has been affecting me as well