Does anyone else feel ashamed of who they used to be?

In high school i hated women. I loved men though. I was boy crazy and did a bunch of crazy shit just to get a mans attention. If i saw another women or girl as a threat I would hate her. There was only one time I let a girl take the guy I liked but that was only because I knew she would stop talking to me if I took him but I still hated her for almost having him. I feel like I hated her much more than I should have over a stupid dude. There are other stories- worse ones and I feel so ashamed of how Desperate I was for a guy to look at me. Even four of them said it was a turnoff and the main reason they didn't want to date me.


Guys i would hang around would vebally abuse me or say they don't like black girls despite being black themselves. I thought i was better than other girls because I had low standards then realised i was being treated like shit.

i still hate myself for being like that in my past. I was a disgusting person.