I dreamt of you.
After being in the friend zone for quite some time, we escalated our relationship to that next level that involves confessions of being in love and beginning the early stages of being physical with each other.
We were helping each other pack our belongings to move on to the next chapter, along with several others we had been living with. One of the others warned me that you were being disingenuous with your intentions of being committed to me and even offered to show me a playback reel of you saying and doing the same with other women, diminishing that feeling of being special that every woman craves to experience. The playback even revealed that the last woman you pursued overlapped with the chapter you and I had written together, further taking the wind out of my sails.
When I woke up abruptly, my right arm…especially my shoulder and forearm…was hurting so badly and constantly that it was like as I was lying on my back I had held my arm up in the air for hours. Mimicking the gesture, I knew it had to be true. It’s like as an act of protection, my physical form was trying to keep the dream form at arm’s length but couldn’t.
It’s a little after 5am and I’m too awake for my own liking. Half wanting to get up and go ahead and get started on my day. Half wanting to give myself the chance to fall back asleep to reset the unnecessary violence my brain decided to start the day with. I’ll more than likely fall asleep thinking of scrambled eggs on whole wheat toast…giving me the healthy reset I need.
We were helping each other pack our belongings to move on to the next chapter, along with several others we had been living with. One of the others warned me that you were being disingenuous with your intentions of being committed to me and even offered to show me a playback reel of you saying and doing the same with other women, diminishing that feeling of being special that every woman craves to experience. The playback even revealed that the last woman you pursued overlapped with the chapter you and I had written together, further taking the wind out of my sails.
When I woke up abruptly, my right arm…especially my shoulder and forearm…was hurting so badly and constantly that it was like as I was lying on my back I had held my arm up in the air for hours. Mimicking the gesture, I knew it had to be true. It’s like as an act of protection, my physical form was trying to keep the dream form at arm’s length but couldn’t.
It’s a little after 5am and I’m too awake for my own liking. Half wanting to get up and go ahead and get started on my day. Half wanting to give myself the chance to fall back asleep to reset the unnecessary violence my brain decided to start the day with. I’ll more than likely fall asleep thinking of scrambled eggs on whole wheat toast…giving me the healthy reset I need.
46-50, F
