Too Far To Go
I’ve been struggling with my mental health since June and it’s steadily got worse. I’d get a bit of a reprieve before I fall back into a pit of emotions. Over Christmas and new years I had 11 days off work but spent most days in tears for no discernible reason.
I’m tired and drained.
Last week I cried every time someone asked if I was okay. I managed to get in to see a new doctor and straight away they’ve put me on HRT.
Day one I felt like a weight had been lifted. The relief when I was immediately taken seriously and not dismissed was immense. But day 2 came and went with no tears. Day 3 I woke up early went out and bought new running trainers in less than 15 minutes (expensive decision), went for a haircut (1st time since June, again a big decision), walked the dog and went shopping (lots of decisions) all before 12. I messaged Bright eyes we went to the cinema, had a Chinese and stayed up late drinking and talking before heading to bed.
Woke up feeling great but by 3pm I felt wired and jittery. Tried to sleep but couldn’t. Then the tears started. I knew this wouldn’t be an easy quick fix but I didn’t expect to feel so great for the last 3 days. I wish it was that easy.
It hurts so much more falling off a mountain than it does off a curb 😔
I’m tired and drained.
Last week I cried every time someone asked if I was okay. I managed to get in to see a new doctor and straight away they’ve put me on HRT.
Day one I felt like a weight had been lifted. The relief when I was immediately taken seriously and not dismissed was immense. But day 2 came and went with no tears. Day 3 I woke up early went out and bought new running trainers in less than 15 minutes (expensive decision), went for a haircut (1st time since June, again a big decision), walked the dog and went shopping (lots of decisions) all before 12. I messaged Bright eyes we went to the cinema, had a Chinese and stayed up late drinking and talking before heading to bed.
Woke up feeling great but by 3pm I felt wired and jittery. Tried to sleep but couldn’t. Then the tears started. I knew this wouldn’t be an easy quick fix but I didn’t expect to feel so great for the last 3 days. I wish it was that easy.
It hurts so much more falling off a mountain than it does off a curb 😔
