I’m probably going to department of mental health housing

On section I think 811 that provides affordable housing for those with disabilities who are low income. It’s housing with 30% of income adjusted gross rent and utility payments and a voucher pays for the rent to the landlord. There are some check ins in place that are kind of like assisted independent living where people check for example you can keep your house tidy or if you need help or if you are feeding yourself properly just as example. It’s for department of mental health clients who are eligible. I am living with my parents for a few more years while I learn the life skills to take care of myself. Hopefully they don’t drive me up the wall until then especially the nonsense about my clothing. It might be a good first step to living on my own. In the meantime I also need to finish some training programs to make an extra $1000-$1500 which while living at home is fine. I’m on disability benefits but I want to make some of my own money to transition to living on my own. Eventually I’m hoping to live completely on my own without assisted check ins. Ideally though, if I had the money to pay for it I would buy some cheap land in a rural area and build a cob or adobe cottage house on the property with no mortgage needed. Another option would be to live in a tiny home maybe around 500-800 square feet in a tiny home village with a lot to rent and rent to own the tiny home cottage or cabin without a credit history and maybe the lot rent would be no more than $300-$700 per month. I dream of living in a house not a low income voucher apartment. Or getting money to purchase a rv motorhome as a living space while I travel around in it or a converted bus home in addition to a cob or adobe house on permanent property. I have big dreams but realistically. Do not have the financial means to make those dreams a reality. My parents will not put a car in my hands never mind helping me get an rv motorhome or converted bus home to live on the road for a part of the year. I will need savings of at least $30,000 to $90,000 to purchase an rv motorhome or converted bus home. $20,000 on the very cheap side. I need to finish my training courses to get a career that pays decently. I have purchased courses from knowadays.com and skillcrush.com. And I still have student loans that my parents are helping me pay back. Some of my disability check is going to my student loans monthly fee. I also want to go back to school to finish my higher education. I should have finished my higher education in my 20s..my dreams that I pictured for myself are increasingly at odds with my reality. My parents will only help me go back to school if it’s on campus again. I want to do it online asynchronously or self paced programs. I will have to work part time and go to school part time ( thats what I can handle) and get Pell grants and scholarships for my demographic. Also the department of vocational rehabilitation. Has some money put aside for each client for education and vocational training. I have to get creative to get what I want. When I do go back it’s going to take years because I will only be taking one or two courses at a time but better late then never. My parents dreamed of a different life for me too back then. it wasn’t until the last couple of years they applied for disability benefits For me. They pictured me with either a formal higher education like a bachelors degree and maybe even a masters degree or later they came to accept even a vocational certificate or diploma in a trade skill such as sewing and tailoring ,visual design and web development, etc. and a full time career for me. I wanted that for myself too but if I got stuck on things I gave up and moved onto the next idea to make money. I didn’t want a full time career though I wanted part time hours of between 20-30 hours a week or its equivalent . Even though I originally meant to go for full time 40 hours per week or the equivalent to make enough money. But full time would probably wear me out too much. I’m not meant to work eight hours a day five days a week or more. More like 4-6 hours per day four or five days a week with 2-3 days off to do other things. I would live frugally to make up for reduced income and get creative with my housing situation to have savings on rent. And do groceries I could use a subscription service like misfits market which is 30-40% grocery store prices to save money. I would lucky to make $50,000 to $100,000 on 25-30 hours per week. Even $30,000 to $45,000 would be better than nothing. Part of me wants to get off disability benefits because I am ashamed to be on them in the first place and I don’t want to remain poor. I actually want to be allowed to have more than $2,000 in the bank but I worry even with what.used to be a middle class income I will struggle to survive once taxes are factored in. I feel like. A leech off the government for going on disability even though I have multiple illnesses. I never pictured this for myself when I was younger. I want to try to stand on my own too feet but part of me wishes I could find a spouse who I felt affection for and cared about also had a comfortable income and I could contribute to finances part time. I would lose disability benefits but could be living in a dignified socially acceptable way with maybe someone who worked full time or was independently wealthy and I could be on their insurance and not have to worry about money. I don’t want a disability trust and I feel a full time career working 40+ hours per week would burn me out and not leave time for my hobbies/interests/talents/passions/skillsets:aptitudes on my days off. I would still be contributing financially just not as the primary breadwinner. I didn’t want to be financially dependent on anyone when I was younger but having a spouse to show me how to navigate adult life would make things much easier. Of course they would to know what they were getting into with me right away and what to expect. I don’t think a well off spouse is the same thing as finding a sugar momma or daddy. My life didn’t turn out the day I planned it at all. My parents don’t think I should.be dependent on anyone because that could set me up to be abused or if my spouse decides they no longer want to help support me and wants a divorce of something then where will I be? I also don’t want to stay on disability benefits like my parents want me to because they are scared I might get into a depression one day and might not be able to work so much or my freelance work is not consistent. The disability benefits act like a buffer and might have give me access to low income housing and other programs that would have my basic needs get met. I still feel partly uncomfortable to be on them and I am partly also resigned to my fate of mediocrity. Disability benefits could be something to help until I get enough freelance remote flexible schedule work but it’s not something I want to be the rest of my adult life on.