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A Picture of Mental Illness

As I look at the happy faces
Thumbing through old photographs
No trace of sorrows
No traces of pain
They cannot tell the whole story
Of what was and what is left

We use to laugh and talk for hours
Now there's only condemnation left
For all I failed to be
For what I cannot be
We cannot rewrite the past
I cannot make you forgive

I only want happiness for the man you become
But,your delusions make me the enemy
Nothing good enough
Nothing believed
How I wish you loved me
Like the little boy in the photographs
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I am so very sorry!!!

This cuts so deep, one has to experience it to fully comprehend the extent of the pain, the gravity,

no cell remains whole,
nothing is as it was before,
nothing is as we had dreamt,
counted on and prayed for and worked so very hard towards!!!
ramifications are still unfolding ...

even as we carried our babes in our bodies...the love affair began....we were changed , forever!!!
[media=https://youtu.be/NagoRWma34s]

I can relate to EVERY word, I just replace he with she.
Justmeraeagain · 56-60, F
@LunadelobosIAMTHEDRAGON
It has gotten slightly better.
My husband passed away in July, and I think my son came to realize you don't always get to keep family around.
I wish it had not taken that, of course.