It's so depressing...

@whowasthatmaskedman My wife talks about how Alzheimer's runs in her family -- her Mom just died of it a few months ago -- but she's been putting off for years talking to her doctor about it.

@ChipmunkErnie My wife wont get a diagnosis. Every time her GP mentions something about it, she switchs Doctors. She sparks up fine for short periods in public and its hard to spot. So she gets away with it. But I set unofficial boundaroes. I wont stop her driving. But her car had had a flat battery for a year now and her smart phone, which she couldnt deal with, got "lost" and wasnt replaced. She accepts those things without question..😷

@swirlie Covid has taken care of Plan B for me. Curtailing travel and making my wife want to be isolated and stay out of crowds. So I manage the shopping and tasks needing to see outsiders. My kids are awareof her situation, but she can even be difficult in company with them, depending on the day. She doesnt do well with technology, so cant use a smart phone, computer and even has difficulty with anything unusual in the TV remote (switching Foxtel to Netflix) So she still has a licence and a car in the drive, but the battery is flat and will stay that way to avoid that pothole.
See. I have already done this twice. With her mother, and my own. Both of them lived with us in their turns. My wife being the nurse was a great help back then. This time I am on my own and not the man I was then.
I hope I have the strength to ride it out, because Plan C doesnt look pretty.😷

@swirlie OK. This will be the last on this, because you really have to live it to know, so your intellectual treatment of it doesnt hold up in Real Life. Having a nurse is great for nursing matters. But dementia requires more caring, empathy and advanced parenting skills than nursing. Trust me. I've been there. Second, having a nursing background tends to make the "patient" more assertive that they know best, in very much the way you described and make them more difficult to handle. And you do have to handle them.
I shop for us and leave the house before 7am to try to return before she wakes up, otherwise she does get anxious after I am gone 30 minutes. And I bring back coffee from her favourite cafe to disarm her anger if she does wake and find me gone.
In closing this. Dealing with dementia in the home is like raising a child in reverse, more than nursing an injury. You are correct in that my wife had the training. and she taught me a lot while managing my mother in law and mother. But in the end, my mother took a turn that made her aggressive and a risk to herself and others and we had to decide to place her professionally. One of the saddest things I ever did, and the greatest relief at the same time.
Now I also know what that feels like and my biggest fear is facing that day again.
Sorry.. Subject closed:😷

@whowasthatmaskedman My heart goes to the struggle you and family are going through, brother. I pray.

@swirlie Peace, user. Everyones' struggles are overwhelming. Just be around for those, whenever possible with gentleness to let all identify the similarity in this world.

@swirlie To close this out: How do I know? Because You are angry (rightfully so) and the sh*tty cards you have been dealt.. And I am pushing 70, have lived it twice with no support other than the person who may be next and I am beaten down enough to consider other options. Thats how. Now kindly let it drop.😷