How to help?
How do you tell someone close to you that they need help? Their mental state is affect myself and others around them. They are in denial and blaming other people for this and that and it’s getting too much now. Any advice please?
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Ask them about it? Something is clearly going on and if it's someone close you should try to act concerned about them and their life. A lot of people tend to ramble their complaints because they know no one listens but they need to get it out so having to consciously describe the problem might give them insight on what's actually wrong.
Try to propose a solution or who to go to. (I'm not saying "solve their problem" because they'll come up to you next time they have one, but if you can try to lead them to some options).
Lastly, you can always end with "you need to get your shit together" (works for some people), because we're all responsible for our problems and whether we'll show it to other people (includes negatively affecting others) and know when to use breaks, seek help etc.
P.S. Don't give them false hope that you'll be there for them if you (don't know you) can't.
Try to propose a solution or who to go to. (I'm not saying "solve their problem" because they'll come up to you next time they have one, but if you can try to lead them to some options).
Lastly, you can always end with "you need to get your shit together" (works for some people), because we're all responsible for our problems and whether we'll show it to other people (includes negatively affecting others) and know when to use breaks, seek help etc.
P.S. Don't give them false hope that you'll be there for them if you (don't know you) can't.
I'm dealing with this actually right now as well. So from what I'm learning it depends on the root cause of their mental state. Like is it drug induced? Disease? An organic physical condition. You have to start from there and work your way up through treatment.
Sometimes though a person will be belligerent and refuse to get help. Which is when you have to pull back and let them fall. Only then will they probably be willing and grateful for help.
But that can be dangerous depending on the condition. So there is a lot of fine line walking.
But approach everything with compassion and knowledge.
Sometimes though a person will be belligerent and refuse to get help. Which is when you have to pull back and let them fall. Only then will they probably be willing and grateful for help.
But that can be dangerous depending on the condition. So there is a lot of fine line walking.
But approach everything with compassion and knowledge.
xNicolax1 · 36-40, F
@canusernamebemyusername Thank you. It’s nothing to do with dugs or anything like that, it’s their temper how they explode and they always right and they get impulsive and very negative. I try to keep them positive and try look at it from this side etc but it’s getting harder as I have problems too and i get the back lash which isn’t helping me mentally
@xNicolax1 That kind of sounds a little like a mood disorder. But that just going on very little. But I have had to pull back in cases that dealt with mood disorders. They many times have to get to the point of desperation.
The hard part would be getting them to see someone. Which means they will probably need to hit rock bottom first.
So try to start putting yourself first a little more if you can.
The hard part would be getting them to see someone. Which means they will probably need to hit rock bottom first.
So try to start putting yourself first a little more if you can.
xNicolax1 · 36-40, F
@canusernamebemyusername yes I thought that to. I’m trying to avoid them hitting rock bottom as I get the brunt of it which is too much for me to deal with. Thank you for replying
Mamapolo2016 · F
Mamapolo2016 · F
@xNicolax1 Yes.
WhateverWorks · 36-40
ozgirl512 · 26-30, F
Depends on how close the relationship is and whether they're an adult...I think often all you can do is standby and help pick up the pieces later ...
Subsumedpat · 36-40, M
You just have to tell them how what they do makes you feel.
BigGuy2 · 26-30, M
Get someone that is NOT close to them, to tell them that they need help ...
...it's a bit like the school child scenario - a school kid will tell things to their teacher, but wouldn't tell things to their own parents
...it's a bit like the school child scenario - a school kid will tell things to their teacher, but wouldn't tell things to their own parents
BigGuy2 · 26-30, M
Contact a Social Worker, they can set in motion a formal assessment