When was the last time you wore something more fancy than your everyday clothes?
Do you enjoy sometimes dressing a bit more formally? Do you like getting dressed up? When was the last time you did it? What did you wear?
What if you were invited to be a guest in a restaurant that required you to wear a suit or a dress, or that warned: “Upscale fashionable dress code strongly enforced”? Does that sound like fun to you — or not? Would you like to get dressed up and dine at any of the restaurants mentioned in the article? Why or why not? What might you wear, if so? How does dressing formally, and perhaps also putting more effort into your grooming and hair styling, affect how you feel? Does it tend to make you feel special and sophisticated — or uncomfortable and not yourself? What is the fanciest thing you have ever worn? The article describes “a belief that many diners are eager to dress up again after an epoch of record-level dowdiness.” Do you think that, after two-plus years of a pandemic, we’re in a moment when people want to dress up again? Or, do you think loungewear is here to stay, and that people will continue dressing down? What are you seeing among your friends and family and in the places you go? If you ever owned a restaurant, would you want it to have a dress code? If so, what would the dress code be? Why? The article raises the issue that restaurant dress codes can be interpreted as discriminatory, and that some local governments have even stepped in to condemn dress codes. What is your reaction? Do you think dress codes could be used as an excuse to deny service to people based on attributes like race or gender? Do you think restaurants struggle with selectively enforcing their dress codes? What, if anything, needs to be done about these issues? Do you prefer to dress to feel "cool" or to feel "pretty"?
There are some things that wearing makes me feel instantly confident and "cool". Chunky boots and oversized layers change the way I walk and move, and I feel like I'm invincible. But often these things aren't flattering on my body. Alternatively, I can wear "pretty" clothes that I know flatter my coloring, body shape, Kibbe type, etc. These clothes make me feel like a romantic lead in a movie! But I lose that "cool" feeling, and end up finding it harder to relax.
I haven't been able to make up my mind about which effect I should prioritize! Is there a feeling you aim for when you get dressed? Would you prefer dressing to feel "cool" or to feel "pretty"? Do you worry about over dressing?
So title sums up pretty well what I would like to ask. I have found as a 21 male student that very few make an effort. There lot are prepared to wear suits for interviews or when they work but as there is no dress code they have little interest in anything but the most comfortable clothes, usually tracksuits or jeans. I do dress well and am lucky to have nice clothes but sometimes I feel restricted for a fear of going too formal or perhaps straying to far from what is considered 'normal' for people my age. Furthermore I am looking to be working in the city of London after I graduate. I have had previous work experience there and I have found that although everyone wears suits it is rare to take it any further than that. Ties are often not required anymore and a three piece or pocket square is even rarer.
So what are your experiences and how do you go about a similar problem you may have? Do you as a woman feel more pressured to dress well in the office compared to men? Advice needed.
My new job has a casual dress code, like jeans and polos for men kind of dress code. Actually, I'm not even sure there is a written code. But in my three visits on site I have noticed that the women dress more business casual. I am a person who dresses up to go to the grocery store, but it made me think about it. Do you as a woman feel more pressure to dress on the business side of casual even in a causal setting? How does this affect you? Also, should I dress down more for the office so it doesn't seem like... idk... like maybe I'm trying too hard? I'm already self conscious because I can tell I am about 10-15 years younger than most of these folks on average, and I'm from a different part of the country where it is more conservative dress, meaning I've been wearing business clothes in offices since my first office job at 16... Help? We are all familiar with dress codes. Things like office jobs and formal events require you to dress in a “formal” way. The problem is that it is often really uncomfortable and impractical. I mean, what’s the point in wearing a bunch of clothes that restrict movement, are easily ruined, and are just plain uncomfortable? Not to mention sometimes people have to be outside, and they are forced to wear a suit and tie in 90 or so degree weather. That’s just unhealthy. It’s not much better for women, either. High heels are often considered “formal”, and yet numerous doctors will tell you that they are bad for your feet and ankles. Our emphasis on appearance is clearly too much of a priority when it overrides things like our health. Now, some people will say that dressing in a formal way helps you to be more productive and motivated. I’ve heard it termed “dressing for success”. The problem is that it really isn’t because of the particular clothes. A suit and tie doesn’t magically improve your motivation. The reason people feel that way is because they constantly see those clothes in a formal or work setting and therefore mentally associate it with important events and productivity. I can guarantee you that if it somehow became “formal” to wear, say, a red t shirt and sweatpants, and everyone wore those clothes to work and formal events, the same increase in motivation and productivity would happen to a person dressing like that. It would be a whole lot more comfortable. Ultimately, you go to work to work, not to dress up. What’s the point in wearing uncomfortable clothing if it isn’t even part of your job? For someone like me, who has sensitivities to certain materials, I think it would ultimately hinder my productivity. How do you feel about dressing formally?
Discussion
Because I don't have the looks and personality to pull off an entire suit without people thinking I'm cute or otherwise without feeling a massive clash from within, I consider adding a few twists to formal or semi-formal clothing I can probably get away with, if the situation fits.
Currently, I would wear dark jeans and a beanie with a dress shirt and dress shoes, but once I care for my hair well enough to leave it be more often and find better fitting clothes, I can wear a narrow, loosely-fit scarf over a dress shirt for volume, and/or a minimal doubled-cord choker to make my neck seem more proportionate. (Yes, I'm somewhat self-conscious about my neck.) Dress shoes will be cool once I find the right style, especially since I want a flat, flexible shoe with ample space for my toes. However, the right pair of calf-high boots over my trousers might set me apart just enough to seem sophisticated. I also prefer black leathers over the usual brown shades. Lastly, if I or another geek ever need to wear a jacket, I would like some small videogame-themed medals to put on the collar, since a rule of thumb for surviving an adult world with "child-like" tastes is to go minimal. One colleague may admire your Nordic dragon badge, another might strike a conversation with you because you both love Skyrim. The problem is I live in a suburban city where most women wear whatever tee they can find on sale at Target with leggings (I mean I like it too, but yeah....), so wearing that stuff will look grossly out of place in an area where everyone is so casual. I also don't really go anywhere except work, and I work in a male-dominated engineering company where the only people I see during the day are a couple of other coworkers and my boss. Heck, even when I go out to dinner or movies with friends, I notice that most will just wear a T-shirt with jeans and little/no makeup. So basically, I have nowhere to dress up, and it sucks because I have taken to dressing casual everywhere too even though I don't want to. I dress casual because tbh, I am scared that I will be judged as "trying too hard" if I wear an outfit like the ones I mentioned in my first paragraph. I find that I have been taking more unecessary shopping trips to the wealthier parts of town (like where millionares live) because people seem to "dress up" more there, and I get to dress up without looking out of place... Can anyone else relate to this? How have you gotten around this?
What if you were invited to be a guest in a restaurant that required you to wear a suit or a dress, or that warned: “Upscale fashionable dress code strongly enforced”? Does that sound like fun to you — or not? Would you like to get dressed up and dine at any of the restaurants mentioned in the article? Why or why not? What might you wear, if so? How does dressing formally, and perhaps also putting more effort into your grooming and hair styling, affect how you feel? Does it tend to make you feel special and sophisticated — or uncomfortable and not yourself? What is the fanciest thing you have ever worn? The article describes “a belief that many diners are eager to dress up again after an epoch of record-level dowdiness.” Do you think that, after two-plus years of a pandemic, we’re in a moment when people want to dress up again? Or, do you think loungewear is here to stay, and that people will continue dressing down? What are you seeing among your friends and family and in the places you go? If you ever owned a restaurant, would you want it to have a dress code? If so, what would the dress code be? Why? The article raises the issue that restaurant dress codes can be interpreted as discriminatory, and that some local governments have even stepped in to condemn dress codes. What is your reaction? Do you think dress codes could be used as an excuse to deny service to people based on attributes like race or gender? Do you think restaurants struggle with selectively enforcing their dress codes? What, if anything, needs to be done about these issues? Do you prefer to dress to feel "cool" or to feel "pretty"?
There are some things that wearing makes me feel instantly confident and "cool". Chunky boots and oversized layers change the way I walk and move, and I feel like I'm invincible. But often these things aren't flattering on my body. Alternatively, I can wear "pretty" clothes that I know flatter my coloring, body shape, Kibbe type, etc. These clothes make me feel like a romantic lead in a movie! But I lose that "cool" feeling, and end up finding it harder to relax.
I haven't been able to make up my mind about which effect I should prioritize! Is there a feeling you aim for when you get dressed? Would you prefer dressing to feel "cool" or to feel "pretty"? Do you worry about over dressing?
So title sums up pretty well what I would like to ask. I have found as a 21 male student that very few make an effort. There lot are prepared to wear suits for interviews or when they work but as there is no dress code they have little interest in anything but the most comfortable clothes, usually tracksuits or jeans. I do dress well and am lucky to have nice clothes but sometimes I feel restricted for a fear of going too formal or perhaps straying to far from what is considered 'normal' for people my age. Furthermore I am looking to be working in the city of London after I graduate. I have had previous work experience there and I have found that although everyone wears suits it is rare to take it any further than that. Ties are often not required anymore and a three piece or pocket square is even rarer.
So what are your experiences and how do you go about a similar problem you may have? Do you as a woman feel more pressured to dress well in the office compared to men? Advice needed.
My new job has a casual dress code, like jeans and polos for men kind of dress code. Actually, I'm not even sure there is a written code. But in my three visits on site I have noticed that the women dress more business casual. I am a person who dresses up to go to the grocery store, but it made me think about it. Do you as a woman feel more pressure to dress on the business side of casual even in a causal setting? How does this affect you? Also, should I dress down more for the office so it doesn't seem like... idk... like maybe I'm trying too hard? I'm already self conscious because I can tell I am about 10-15 years younger than most of these folks on average, and I'm from a different part of the country where it is more conservative dress, meaning I've been wearing business clothes in offices since my first office job at 16... Help? We are all familiar with dress codes. Things like office jobs and formal events require you to dress in a “formal” way. The problem is that it is often really uncomfortable and impractical. I mean, what’s the point in wearing a bunch of clothes that restrict movement, are easily ruined, and are just plain uncomfortable? Not to mention sometimes people have to be outside, and they are forced to wear a suit and tie in 90 or so degree weather. That’s just unhealthy. It’s not much better for women, either. High heels are often considered “formal”, and yet numerous doctors will tell you that they are bad for your feet and ankles. Our emphasis on appearance is clearly too much of a priority when it overrides things like our health. Now, some people will say that dressing in a formal way helps you to be more productive and motivated. I’ve heard it termed “dressing for success”. The problem is that it really isn’t because of the particular clothes. A suit and tie doesn’t magically improve your motivation. The reason people feel that way is because they constantly see those clothes in a formal or work setting and therefore mentally associate it with important events and productivity. I can guarantee you that if it somehow became “formal” to wear, say, a red t shirt and sweatpants, and everyone wore those clothes to work and formal events, the same increase in motivation and productivity would happen to a person dressing like that. It would be a whole lot more comfortable. Ultimately, you go to work to work, not to dress up. What’s the point in wearing uncomfortable clothing if it isn’t even part of your job? For someone like me, who has sensitivities to certain materials, I think it would ultimately hinder my productivity. How do you feel about dressing formally?
Discussion
Because I don't have the looks and personality to pull off an entire suit without people thinking I'm cute or otherwise without feeling a massive clash from within, I consider adding a few twists to formal or semi-formal clothing I can probably get away with, if the situation fits.
Currently, I would wear dark jeans and a beanie with a dress shirt and dress shoes, but once I care for my hair well enough to leave it be more often and find better fitting clothes, I can wear a narrow, loosely-fit scarf over a dress shirt for volume, and/or a minimal doubled-cord choker to make my neck seem more proportionate. (Yes, I'm somewhat self-conscious about my neck.) Dress shoes will be cool once I find the right style, especially since I want a flat, flexible shoe with ample space for my toes. However, the right pair of calf-high boots over my trousers might set me apart just enough to seem sophisticated. I also prefer black leathers over the usual brown shades. Lastly, if I or another geek ever need to wear a jacket, I would like some small videogame-themed medals to put on the collar, since a rule of thumb for surviving an adult world with "child-like" tastes is to go minimal. One colleague may admire your Nordic dragon badge, another might strike a conversation with you because you both love Skyrim. The problem is I live in a suburban city where most women wear whatever tee they can find on sale at Target with leggings (I mean I like it too, but yeah....), so wearing that stuff will look grossly out of place in an area where everyone is so casual. I also don't really go anywhere except work, and I work in a male-dominated engineering company where the only people I see during the day are a couple of other coworkers and my boss. Heck, even when I go out to dinner or movies with friends, I notice that most will just wear a T-shirt with jeans and little/no makeup. So basically, I have nowhere to dress up, and it sucks because I have taken to dressing casual everywhere too even though I don't want to. I dress casual because tbh, I am scared that I will be judged as "trying too hard" if I wear an outfit like the ones I mentioned in my first paragraph. I find that I have been taking more unecessary shopping trips to the wealthier parts of town (like where millionares live) because people seem to "dress up" more there, and I get to dress up without looking out of place... Can anyone else relate to this? How have you gotten around this?
