I Need to Feel Loved and Appreciated

Being lonely, and having your only friends leave you really hurts. People seem to like to be mean to me. So many times they either just left or they pulled elaborate crap resulting in my other friends hating me. My first BF was a jerk and made me ashamed of my small chest. I just want a real man, not one who acts like a boy. I'm beginning to lose hope that I'll ever find a BF or any close friends.