Love & Attraction

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Love is not unconditional

Saying “I love you” is literally just a word.

To love someone is to do an action of selfless ness for them. It’s sacrificing your own desires( your self) with the intention of honoring the other person or doing something for the other person that will make them happy.

Relationships are built on conditions and terms.

If a person violates or doesn’t comply with certain terms of the relationship then someone is offended.

Love is not unconditional.

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robertsnj · 56-60, M Best Comment

[quote]Relationships are built on conditions and terms.[/quote]

that is the most important take away from your post. I agree with your post.

Heavenlywarrior · 36-40, M

@robertsnj lol 😂 thanks

Colonelmustardseed · 36-40

In romantic relationships, maybe. But there are mothers who love their children unconditionally.

Heavenlywarrior · 36-40, M

@Colonelmustardseed that’s true. Some mothers Love towards their children are unconditional.

Zeusdelight · 61-69, M

Not every selfless action ends up with happiness, either immediately or sometimes ever.

Relationships are a living growing thing.

They cannot be captured in a document with terms and conditions.

Long term relationships are between living changing people, not robots.

Heavenlywarrior · 36-40, M

@Zeusdelight I can agree to a certain degree. It’s a minor case that someone doesn’t result in being happy when something is done for them from with empathy.

If your partner does something for you that you enjoy and makes your heart light up wouldn’t you appreciate them more?

Zeusdelight · 61-69, M

@Heavenlywarrior In that moment, I would be delighted and happy with her action. But she would simply continue to confirm the person she is.

But more appreciation of the person she is, and her effect in and on my life, occurs when I discover more about her or gain more insight into the person she is.

Magenta · F

Indeed. If it weren't true there wouldn't be so so many break-ups and heartaches.

ETA: Some may seem as if they are, but I say let them cheat on you, betray, lie, or spend all their time on social media not giving you attention, then let's see if it's unconditional.

Heavenlywarrior · 36-40, M

@Magenta so many.

exexec · 61-69, C

I like to think of our love as unconditional. If she were to totally reject me, divorce me, and marry/unite with another man or woman, then I think my love for her would go away. So I suppose my love for her is not totally unconditional.

Justice4All · 36-40, M

@exexec Your love for her will not go away. You would be fooling yourselves and living a miserable life. A lot of people are living miserable lives because they're too proud and bitter to call up their ex and say , "yes I'm desperately missing you. I think of you everyday no matter what I do."

Heavenlywarrior · 36-40, M

@exexec maybe that’s called being attached. I feel like we can like something so much because how we feel when we with it that we don’t want to live life without it even when what we like doesn’t want us or even disrespects us to some degree.

Justice4All · 36-40, M

Indeed, that concept seems plausible, but what factors define love? There are instances where women are like, "I love him as long as he keeps me in a Mercedes Benz." Is that truly love, or...

I've been in a relationship where a young girl was always up my a** as long as I was giving her money. I actually thought that she loved me. As soon as I stopped giving her money, that was all she wrote.

Heavenlywarrior · 36-40, M

@Justice4All that’s true. So maybe the connection we build with someone is a Bond or soul tie. Based on our experiences with them that caused us to feel that feeling in the first place.

Before you knew her you didn’t “love” her.
You loved her because how she made you feel which is an action, and possibly how she looked. Which are also conditions.

Pinkstarburst

You’ve never had a dog have you?

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Pinkstarburst

@eMortal I’m sticking to my answer.

Heavenlywarrior · 36-40, M

@eMortal thanks for that response I don’t need to that much lol. @Pinkstarburst what happens when owners turn on their dogs and start being cruel, hitting a dog over and over? Do you think a dog would resent the owner, be fearful , lose respect or even attack?
What you said is a bit subjective.

eMortal · M

@Heavenlywarrior if you start abusing your dog, it’ll just hide when it smells your presence.

Elanor · F

Not all relationships are built on conditions and terms

Love is unconditional for some … and it’s beautiful even the difficult parts lead to fulfilment the soul needs

Sadly some are in a conditional relationship

That’s toxic

Doesn’t mean it’s not salvageable changes can be made to move on in a healthy way question is do they want to make those changes or stay in their situation

Different hats for different cats 🐱

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