@Ferise1 the term 'black hole' is when I recognise some others who have experienced depression. All I can do is to encourage you to speak to someone you think can help and don't try to carry it on your own. You might be still very much recovering from your loss.
@FreddieUK no the falling into hell feeling started seven years ago, and right now I think Iām in a new phase. Iām in the black hole literally. š° itās beyond terrifying. I hope my medās are enough to keep it at bay