I want to kms.

I'm so fucking tired of being misunderstood. I want to die right now and i can do it now. I am on vacation and I can just unlock the door go for a walk and go to the sea to drown. My family keeps asking ne why i want to die is because I'm unlovable. And fat and ugly. I don't see the future in my life. And I can't tell them that. Because I'm too much of a coward and I don't know how to put my words. And now I'm regretting my actions because i broke my headphones. My only way to escape my depression saying "you are useless" 24/7. Music was like therapy to me. Now... I can't enjoy it. I want to end myself right now and i don't think I'll regret it. And I bet none of you care either!