Love is a hit and miss for everyone

Not everyone gets that happy family or settle down moment they want.

[Kinda venting here or dumping the thoughts inside my head]

Though, I'm not sure I'll ever want to date again. Seems so complicated these days. I'm not saying Love is dead, it just isn't for me. I had it, and it sorta got ruined for me. I do blame myself partially, but then again i wasn't the doing the cheating. I cannot say everyone is like that but they do have the potential to be cheaters themselves, even me. Its a weakness of temptations given in or the thrill of it to make you feel alive. We can't always trust someone fully, nor can we trust ourselves to how we react to something like that for the first time.

If i were to give a ten year old version of myself advice. Is to emotionally grow thicker skin, life is gonna throw emotions at you. Heartache, betrayal, death, these emotions need to be processed and not festered on why. Don't dwell, grieve, cry, get it out the system because even if you lose trust in those around you, there one thing you can do ...and that you can depend on yourself because it hard to turn your own back on yourself.

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FullerSchmidt · 36-40, MVIP

If I were to give advice to you at any age it would be.

Love is a two way street. In order for it to work, both parties need to be willing to give more than they receive.

In fact, if you truly love someone, you'd be willing to give unconditionally, regardless of what you received (even if it were nothing, or even were taken advantage of).

The point of my advice is that in instances of true love, amounts aren't counted, as both parties desire the other person's happiness more than their own.

Finding someone with whom you can share this is extremely rare. Either you just don't find yourself compelled to desire their happiness above all else, or secretly you're measuring each-other's capacity and capabilities before committing "love".

If you're looking for inspiration, read the traditional (old-timey) marriage vows.
"For better, for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health"
"Till death do us part"

True love is a wonderful thing, an it absolutely is "for" you, as it is for everyone. But it requires a willingness to give, not just receive, by two people, who have aligned ideas of where they want to be in life, and what happiness is. You also both need to be in the right emotional place.

Only very rarely is love found between one who is desperate and destitute, and one who is in a position to give (with the exception of asymmetric physical beauty, in favor of the desperate one). That's called charity, and it doesn't last forever.

If you can't give at least what you expect to get from a loving relationship then you're the one at fault.

Note: This is why I think people who demand "unconditional love" are not only extremely selfish, but entirely unrealistic.

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