I feel guilty.

ever since i broke up with my gf i feel so guilty. because ever since the school year started i was being so mean to her,telling her to stfu or stuff like that but i didnt mean them deeply i just said them so they could be said and still loved her deeply.but one day we had an argument and broke up cz i was being mean and shit like that.she told me that i wasnt texting her enough,wasnt being kind with her and blaming everything on her and she thought i didnt love her anymore. but i was still very much inlove with her and i was just so stressed becuase of my academics and stuff,the schools here are strict so are my tutors.i get almost hundreds of pages homework everyday and i still study 70hrs a week which is too much for me because i dont like studying much.and she wasnt texting much either. sometimes it was just..silence.nothing more. but when we had an argument and she told me those stuff i was really shaken and self conscious abt what i did.i apologized a billion times and she ssid she forgave me but i dont even know if shemeant that.its been 4 months i still cant get over it,i miss her like crazy but i think she already has a crush on someone else.whats wrong w me.