so like im super jealous
So. I've been friends with, let's say, May, for 10 years, but our relationship isn't thriving. Recently (this september) we met a guy, let's call him Jake. And with that guy we clicked instantly and he became part of our friend group.
Lately I have noticed myself going downhill emotionally. I feel anger, sadness, jealousy, all that, I quite literally want to scream daily. So most of it is my fault.
But like today May and Jake left for another country on a school trip, one which I was supposed to go to but my parents declined at the very last moment. As usual, my mom always says okay and when it's time to sign she refuses.
I, therefore, wish to have been with them. My friends, or whatever.
I love Jake and have fun with him more than I do with May, it's like we clicked instantly, however i feel like he prefers May to me and it's not the best feeling. On the other hand, the only friend I had, May, seems to be getting further away from me with each moment. It's like as if we have been emotionally distanced since September and I hate it but I don't want to hurt her by saying so and I dont want to say it because she will think i'm trying to ruin her life.
These friends went on a trip and since then I have been boiling with jealousy and loneliness. I constantly want to rip out my hair I just feel like it's unfair. They're calling my number and screaming and laughing and although they might feel like I want to hear them and know how they are I just can't bear seeing them where i want to be. Especially May, to me it feels like she's trying to make me jealous and it's working, although that's probably not her goal.
I have nowhere to say this, so if anyone is reading this, do you have any advice on how to overcome my jealousy without getting rid of my friendgroup?? (also I've been wanting to go to therapy but I can't bring myself to ask mom.)
thank you!! lol
Lately I have noticed myself going downhill emotionally. I feel anger, sadness, jealousy, all that, I quite literally want to scream daily. So most of it is my fault.
But like today May and Jake left for another country on a school trip, one which I was supposed to go to but my parents declined at the very last moment. As usual, my mom always says okay and when it's time to sign she refuses.
I, therefore, wish to have been with them. My friends, or whatever.
I love Jake and have fun with him more than I do with May, it's like we clicked instantly, however i feel like he prefers May to me and it's not the best feeling. On the other hand, the only friend I had, May, seems to be getting further away from me with each moment. It's like as if we have been emotionally distanced since September and I hate it but I don't want to hurt her by saying so and I dont want to say it because she will think i'm trying to ruin her life.
These friends went on a trip and since then I have been boiling with jealousy and loneliness. I constantly want to rip out my hair I just feel like it's unfair. They're calling my number and screaming and laughing and although they might feel like I want to hear them and know how they are I just can't bear seeing them where i want to be. Especially May, to me it feels like she's trying to make me jealous and it's working, although that's probably not her goal.
I have nowhere to say this, so if anyone is reading this, do you have any advice on how to overcome my jealousy without getting rid of my friendgroup?? (also I've been wanting to go to therapy but I can't bring myself to ask mom.)
thank you!! lol
13-15
