TW i dont know what to do anymore

i feel like giving up, i have been feeling this way for just over a year now. i dont know what to do with myself. every time i think im getting better and im not self harming or overdosing. i end up relapsing. it makes me feel so guilty and upset cos no one seems to understand me or want to listen to me. my family dont get it. in my household if we arent screaming at each other, we are all doing our own thing there isnt a time where we arent shouting. my dad is horrid to me. screams and blames everything on me. i dont know what to do anymore