NEED ADVICE friendship struggles

Hi so I have this very close friend of mine. And I hate to admit it bus she’s very toxic. I ignored all the red flags whilst she has way too many. She also doesn’t have a lot of friends anymore because she gaslights and manipulates. I wasn’t sure if I was over exaggerating at first. However I’m so frustrated with her now that I am pretty sure at this moment that she is toxic. So basically I wanted to throw myself a birthday party with friends. I’ve had a lot of anxiety about it because it’s outside my comfort zone. I was also struggling with who to invite because I’m friends with people from different small friend groups, who all know and like each other but aren’t necessarily close. But neither am I with them because I’m in a friend group with toxic girly who chased away all our other friends who were in the friend group. Now it’s just me, a friend who’s always with her shitty boyfriend, and her. I do have other friends that I really like and love hanging out with, but I’m not actually part of their friend group. And every time I try to get closer to them, toxic girly steps in and is being nice with me and makes me feel like we’re besties and I suddenly don’t care about creating a stronger bond with other people. Every time i sit at another table or am just not by her side, she calls me, texts me, desperately searches for me. I first thought it was sweet that someone cares about me, but now idk anymore. Anyway I invited one of our ex friend group friends who, I have to admit, I don’t talk much to anymore. But she is close with people I hang with sometimes and I really wanted to invite them. So I thought it would be kind of weird and mean if I didn’t invite her (the ex friendgroup friend), whilst we never even had any fights. She did have fights with toxic girly tho… that’s why she decided to leave.
Anyhow, the first thing toxic girly texts me when I made the group chat and invited everyone was : “bro why (name)?”. Not even wow fun! Or something like that.
So I responded with quite a neutral answer:”brooo I’m also just doing something 😭”
“Yes but whyyyy”
I tell her the truth
“I really wanted to invite (names) and I knew they would probably tell (name) if I didn’t invite her, so I thought ok whatever who cares”
She responds back:
“And so? What does it matter? Did you go to her party?”
“No I didn’t but I thought it would be kind of mean, I wouldn’t like it if that were to happen to me”
“Idk I just think it’s weird since we or at least you haven’t been friends with her for years, but ig we’ll see”

And then I left her on read. Like how can you just decide that for me that we’re not friends anymore. I mean yes we’re not close anymore but we never fought like you guys did??? And what do I have to do with this information? I can’t just uninvite her bruh. I need advice am I over reacting? I mean she is in the wrong right?

Mindful · 56-60, F

There’s a saying that if you don’t have anything nice to say, don’t say it at all. And bring more of your own food to share. I would just start turning true comments back on her by saying are you sure your aren’t talking about yourself? “I’d like you to try really hard to find something nice and true about each of your friends and try to focus on that, be glad you know someone like that, because it’s annoying hearing YOU complain every single day. Or… why do you always have to say ugly things. About people? If you don’t love others you can’t live yourself and if you don’t love yourself, accept yourself, you can’t live others. People are people and everyone is different. No one is perfect. We are all here trying to become better people. Why don’t you try it?