I just wanted to share this and i feel like i needed to vent, no i really need to vent
I wanna share what i said to chat gpi i also wanna see your insights about my situation
yesterday, i told you about my online friend we had an issue because my connection with him is just below bare minimum and i tried to explain to him the situation but suddenly i realize he already unfriended me without any reason... and before that happened i feel like nothing like you know? i feel stoic i didnt react or anything i wonder why is it because his not that important? even though his the only one i have and i dont have any friends in personal or never experience what does it feel like to be in a friendship? and yet he abandoned me like im just a piece of garbage but it didnt really affect me, was it because im already used being alone? even though it hurts realizing how cant i escape from loneliness? and yet im already 17 and still never had a friend because i been sorrounded with the wrong people and each day by day im struggling and suffering going to school knowing im gonna stay with my boring and useless classmates whos very ignorant? and im pressuring myself to improve and mature by seeing myself in the future and forcing myself to be a working student knowing its the only possible way that can help me, and here i am talking to you with my burdens because i have no one to talk to and i dont even know if i can trust the people i been talking with my problems, tell me is this really how life works for me? i really want to improve, one day when i wake up i know what to do and start improving and learn new hobbies and try to find friends online or in personal but here i am suffering and struggling feeling emotionless and numb since i dont know what to feel being abandoned by someone whos the only thing i have. and been dealing issue with my classmates at school all the time i just cant take it, it affects my energy and mood and its making me drained. i really wanna create a goal and task to atleast have some progress to improve, i already said to myself that when i turned 17 i need to make everything right and have no regrets because when i turned 18 thats when will i take tought responsibilities in life now and yet im still at the point where i feel frustrated because of all this issues. honestly i really feel hopeless now all i need is some human contact. i been desperate to have friends but i need to be patience but i cant take it anymore and having friends in online and in personal are more completely different. it just all the same everytime i wake up its always the same, nothing happened and nothing improved to myself. i wanna take actions and make plans but it stops me im lacking motives. i really wanna try taking responsibility in this kind of age now and yes im already 17 i just wanna start improving and probably setting aside from finding friends for now but i do also have problems discovering myself like my personalities or my hobbies like my purpose and everything about myself, i also need to work on myself and how i connect to people. i already said to myself that i will take an advice and hear your insights about what i said now im doing it since maybe it will stop me from doing it and it will just take times or longer so i already did it and since procrastination is attacking me. now can i please hear your insight about this Mr therapist?
yesterday, i told you about my online friend we had an issue because my connection with him is just below bare minimum and i tried to explain to him the situation but suddenly i realize he already unfriended me without any reason... and before that happened i feel like nothing like you know? i feel stoic i didnt react or anything i wonder why is it because his not that important? even though his the only one i have and i dont have any friends in personal or never experience what does it feel like to be in a friendship? and yet he abandoned me like im just a piece of garbage but it didnt really affect me, was it because im already used being alone? even though it hurts realizing how cant i escape from loneliness? and yet im already 17 and still never had a friend because i been sorrounded with the wrong people and each day by day im struggling and suffering going to school knowing im gonna stay with my boring and useless classmates whos very ignorant? and im pressuring myself to improve and mature by seeing myself in the future and forcing myself to be a working student knowing its the only possible way that can help me, and here i am talking to you with my burdens because i have no one to talk to and i dont even know if i can trust the people i been talking with my problems, tell me is this really how life works for me? i really want to improve, one day when i wake up i know what to do and start improving and learn new hobbies and try to find friends online or in personal but here i am suffering and struggling feeling emotionless and numb since i dont know what to feel being abandoned by someone whos the only thing i have. and been dealing issue with my classmates at school all the time i just cant take it, it affects my energy and mood and its making me drained. i really wanna create a goal and task to atleast have some progress to improve, i already said to myself that when i turned 17 i need to make everything right and have no regrets because when i turned 18 thats when will i take tought responsibilities in life now and yet im still at the point where i feel frustrated because of all this issues. honestly i really feel hopeless now all i need is some human contact. i been desperate to have friends but i need to be patience but i cant take it anymore and having friends in online and in personal are more completely different. it just all the same everytime i wake up its always the same, nothing happened and nothing improved to myself. i wanna take actions and make plans but it stops me im lacking motives. i really wanna try taking responsibility in this kind of age now and yes im already 17 i just wanna start improving and probably setting aside from finding friends for now but i do also have problems discovering myself like my personalities or my hobbies like my purpose and everything about myself, i also need to work on myself and how i connect to people. i already said to myself that i will take an advice and hear your insights about what i said now im doing it since maybe it will stop me from doing it and it will just take times or longer so i already did it and since procrastination is attacking me. now can i please hear your insight about this Mr therapist?
