I’m so mentally drained rn

I had a friend group of three including my friend (I’m just going to use amber and Lisa for privacy reasons) Amber was really jealous of us hanging out with other people, and she would usually hang out with one of us and leave the other one out. Like she would hang out with Lisa and leave me out, or she would hang out with me and leave Lisa out. After 2 years of that Lisa left the school and Amber and I stopped talking, and 4 years after not talking we finally started talking again. I was already talking with Lisa, it had been a year of fun and now we’re in middle school. Lisa goes to that school and Amber does as well, I have a strong relationship with Amber and she has a strong one with me. This one time I got out of class I ran to go find them, and couldn’t so I walked over to my cousins table and just sat there down. I started getting confident and talking with the people on the table, and I saw Lisa and Amber walk out the Cafeteria smiling and laughing. I got up and asked where they were and Lisa told me not to worry, Amber just shrugged and sat down at a table. I sat down next to her but was asked to move because Lisa wanted to sit next to Amber, I told them I didn’t wanna move and they got up and left. I began crying and couldn’t hold it, I just wanted to go home. I messaged my cousins sister to come pick me up and it was fine if she couldn’t, she said she couldn’t because her boyfriend was at work and she doesn’t have a car or a license. She asked if i wanted her to come walk over but that was like 30 minutes, I told her I would walk and I just walked out of school. (FYI Lisa is my ex and I don’t feel strongly about her anymore. But that’s half my life I throw away if we aren’t friends anymore.) I was urged to stop by the teacher wandering, I ignored her and started crying a bunch. I saw Amber and Lisa and they tried helping me, I pushed them and told them to leave me alone. I have anger issues and I was just ticked off, I apologised and ran out as fast as I could. I got to my cousins sisters house and just started sobbing in her hands I didnt go to school for 2 days, but I ended up going on Friday. And when I walked in I had to speak with the principal immediately, I finished the meeting and went to class. I sat there motionless, and I’m the funny kid so I was a target. Everyone started annoying me and I had to smile and laugh, at the recess bell I walked to the Cafeteria to buy some food and Lisa and Amber ran towards me. “why did you push us? do you hate us? Are you ignoring us? Your cousin told us what you did.” Those words stood out to me, “your cousin told me what you did”. I looked around and tried walking away, “you act as if your too special to talk with us” Amber said, “just because we’re friends.” Lisa said backing her up, I began crying and yelled at the top of my lungs. “IM MAD, AMBER YOU KNOW HOW I FEEL TOWARDS LISA! AND LISA YOU DONT UNDERSTAND ANYTHING. I FELT SO SAFE AROUND YOU TWO AND NOW THAT YOU APPARENTLY KNOW EVERYTHING ABOUT ME I DONT!” I screamed. I stopped and ran past them, I ran out of the school and into an alleyway. I’m a 13 year old female in a dark alleyway crying my eyes out, I can’t just leave like that. I just transferred there, I can’t leave them that’s half my life gone, I can’t go back they’re gonna make fun of me. I have nobody to talk to I can trust so I decided to just vent it all out here. To strangers.