I feel that nobody cares about me

It might sound stupid because I'm young but I feel just so bad. I don't even know who I am. I don't have a character. It's sometimes like I'm just a place for negative emotions. I can't make a proper relationships. My problems started a year ago when I got new friends. I was really in love with them. Mostly with one girl. When I think about it i guess I hated everyone else except her but I wanted them all to like me. It started very beautiful, When I was talking to Her I was really happy but It's something different and It will never come back because now I can't belive that she could be such a nice person. When I'm thinking about all this time we've spent together I'm wondering when it all went wrong. i was kind off obsessed with her. I have treated her like a kind of a god. She was everything for me in that time. It mind sound stupid but actually my mood depended on hers. If she was sad I was too and I felt guilty about this. I was always overthinking and wondering if she likes me or not. At first I was asking her did I said anything wrong but later I stopped. My mood depended of how she treated me and It was hell bad because later she started to treat me very bad. She and her friends were taking my things, broke my pencils. They were writing on my body without permission. They were calling me names and insulting me. They beat me with many stuffs. I was feeling really bad because of this. I was hopeless. People that I cared about the most were so rude for me, I got worse. When I was coming back to school I was just crying and wondering how bad is tommorow gonna be. I started sh and I was so exhausted that I couldn't have done anything. I haven't rold my parents about the way they treated me because I was scared that my friend are going to be mad at me and I was still considering that they just take it all as a joke but I was felling so uncomfortable and despair everyday that i decided to commit suicide, I haven't got an idea how to do that because I wanted it to not hurt. So I take pills with paracetamol (10 i guess). I wasn't sure if It's going to work so I took so little for my mother not to notice. Sadly, I was still alive. I just puked and that's all. Now I thought that I got better, that I'm finally happy now but It's just getting worse. My old friend isn't my friend anymore and I got new friends but I' so paranoid that my friend is secretly befriend with my ex friend and she hates me. All my other friends probably hate me too. But It's nothing suprising. I can't make relationships because I'm so anxious of rejection and abandonment that I often break contact with people I care about because I'm scared that they'll leave me first. I got obsesssed with people so easily. They just need to tell me a few kind words and all my mood depends of how they treated me today. It just feel so unreal. I'm jealous when my friend just talk with someone else (I never tell her anything becuase I'm too anxious of course) but I feel so satisfied when she look jealous. I feel that nobody care about me and I feel so anxious. It might souns stupid but I found a comfort in taking pills because I always have this feeling that maybe I'm going to die or went to hospital so I son't have to deal with everytinhg anymore. i took pills like 4 times and everytime I took 10 pills. I feel so overwhelmed with the thing that happend with my friends one year ago and I think It's a reason why I'm like that.