dumb as fuck

my mom has high ass expectations of me especially when it comes to school work. she always gets so abusive whenever I get bad grades. the only reason shes set high expectations from me is because I have this smart ass sister and I used to be at the top of my class. i have no idea how I'm meant to tell her that the only reason my grades have been doing so dog shit is mainly because of my mental health and feeling unmotivated to do absolutely anything. i know damn well that if i tell her about me being unmotivated shed say "stop being lazy then" except that's not the problem. its the fact that i have so much pressure on me that its literally eating me alive. we had this fight just tonight because she saw that i haven't been doing my hw and my test scores are low. I'm pretty sure I'm the problem lol. but eversince like 2020 (???) I've been feeling like shit all the time. I'm being completely honest i don't even want to go to school lmao. all its done is fuck me up and make me want to kms. + i never have anyone to talk to. i always feel like I'm a burden whenever i open up which is also a reason i haven't told anyone I'm close to any of this. id always feel people would pity me if i open up about any of this or they'd see me as a burden. plus no one would ever expect it especially from me, my "personality" is meant to be jovial and outgoing except acting like it is fuckign me up so bad. i just wanna disappear and be alone. i never get my personal space especially bc i share a room w my sister and i always have to go downstairs to be able to actually do anything because shes always otp w someone. even my friends get affected because of what I'm feeling and the worst part is that their friends with the persona i have and no actually me. i feel like this is wayyy too long tho lmao so ill end it here, ngl it feels nice being able to let this all out :))

TexChik · F

Sorry but its time to grow up and be responsible. Mom is right! Your current attitude will land you a great job at walmart making their minimum and living a shit life. What you do now matters more than any other time in your life. Get it together, pay attention in class , and do the work. I would wager if you taste a little academic success, you will want more of it. Its all about the work. You have to do it. If you dont know how to study ask your mom for a tutor to give you some ideas. Everyone is different, but the results are what is important. Dont give up on yourself, you will always regret it. Do the work!

sirenofthesea · F

I’m so glad my parents left me free my whole life and never asked about school. I got to grow into a free spirited, creative, holistic, passionate person. Schools only honour one way of knowing that is left brain thinking, they don’t care about any other aspect of our person, creativity, right brain thinking, emotions, etc etc. They don’t care if you’re low ebb from mental health issues either. I pray that you manage to move out before she destroys you. Most people study at uni then go onto 9-5’s and spend their lives desperately unhappy. Be different.

awhitedot · 46-50, M

Sounds like your parents have done a shit job of motivating you and explaining why it’s important. It certainly shouldn’t be to make them happy. Why does getting good grades make them happy? Because they know it’s important for your future. Sadly they aren’t communicating this well.