What do I do ?

I came to her I told her I was having a shit week and was feeling depressed my exact words . Want to know her response word for word ? I'll tell you I quote from the voice message."Yeah I'm just out of school there there's been shit going on so I haven't been able to talk to anyone. Yolo I have music practice and then arch club straight after so that's going to be really fun. I have arch club today,Which I'm really excited for get my mind off stuff it's a Thursday" what type of person not even friend pulls that shit I literally say I've been feeling depressed and she goes and says that. I honestly shouldn't be surprised she keeps hurting me at first I thought it was my fault I was overly sensitive but after that no it's all her. I cried after that I was crying before but that made me realise that this person who I called one of my closest friends could see me struggling who I literally told that I needed to talk to say that shit. I don't know maybe im the problem.I just hate the way I keep going back to her for comfort she is my oldest friend and I feel like I owe it to her to keep her my friend because she put up with me for so long. But I realised she didn't do anything that a normal friend would do she did less I don't know how to stop talking to her because she is closer with all my friends and I'm afraid to be alone. I can't tell anyone this because it's my fault I keep going to her even though she couldn't say it more clearly that she doesn't give a shit about me.

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Penny · 46-50, F

maybe shes tired of it. maybe shes suggesting you take up some activities to ease your depression? i mean, sure she didnt sound exactly sympathetic but at the same time we dont know the whole picture

WaryWitchWandering · 36-40, F

@Penny could be could be… but the age of the OP tells me it could be more an ignorance thing (I could very well be wrong)

Some people haven’t experienced depression. They just don’t get it.

I know I can be exhausting to listen to at times with my own issues and shit… some of the people around me could never relate, thankfully I know a couple people that have been through it/deal with it too… and we can relate and even sometimes joke about it.

I get what you’re saying though… some people are more needy and can be draining to be around.

Clodagh · 18-21, F

@Penny I get that people get sick of it but the thing is this was the first time I had admitted to anyone how much I'm struggling mentally.

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Clodagh · 18-21, F

@Penny I struggle with my mental health and for the last two weeks it's gotten worse and I got bad news two weeks ago and everything seems to be going downhill I feel like I'm drowning in overthinking and shit I don't want any sympathy I want some advice to get better and start enjoying life not wishing it was over

WaryWitchWandering · 36-40, F

@Clodagh maybe go to doctor or seek therapy if it’s that bad

I truly don’t want you to let things get to a point you can’t handle it anymore.

Penny · 46-50, F

@Clodagh well, you have to pull upon your inner resources and try to get yourself in a better mood instead of wallow in it lol. though wallowing can happen too and could even be healthy to indulge in it for a short time.i believe happiness is a state of mind we can cultivate. i also know that depression can be real and debilitating too though. it depends. when i was a preteen to about my 30's i had major depression due to trauma. i had every reason to be happy but i was always depressed anyway. getting and learning reiki helped fix me i think. i credit it at least for pulling me out of it. there's also such a thing as chemical imbalance that can caus eit, but seeing as you seem to going through a rough patch it seems like you could snap out of it with a little thoughtful reflection and maybe some work like self-help type stuff. if you could pinpoint what it is that is bringing you down the most that would be helpful so you could take action to remedy the situation. its also getting winter. lack of sunlight can be a major cause of depression too. id suggest reading the art of happiness by the dalai lama if you liek to read. i found it a helpful book. (one of many on the subject that ive read, hopefully its the one im thinking of lol) im kind of a hypocrite too though because i take kratom for depression as well. i find it very helpful and i kind of rely on it. i dont think it would work as well without a positive mindset too though. but i think it helps a lot.

WaryWitchWandering · 36-40, F

@Penny reiki is amazing … but be careful downplaying her shit. We don’t know the full story ya know?

Also… I still struggle with depressive episodes off and on. Some of them were absolutely debilitating, and the only thing that could help me climb up and out was getting back on a med for it.

Penny · 46-50, F

@WaryWitchWandering well, im not a fan of psych meds for depression personally. and i do have a lot of experience with them so i wouldnt recommend them personally. but to each their own

WaryWitchWandering · 36-40, F

@Penny everyone is different, and I totally get that

I just want OP to feel heard and maybe ask for help if she needs it (professionals/parent/trusted person)