I don't know
My boyfriend and I haven't even been dating for a month. But I've had a crush on him for more than 5 months.
He had rejected me once before, but that was because we weren't excatly familiar with each other. I understood completely, but still kept my feelings close to heart, I'm the style of person to have feelings for someone but have no intention on dating them. It sounds messed up, I know.
We talked a lot after that, and got to know each other a lot better. I was happy about that, satisfied even. But everything went south when he confessed and asked me to be his girlfriend.
At that time, I was already unsure about if I still have those feelings for him. But once I felt that I was completely overjoyed at that moment, I figured that I still liked him just as much as I did before.
Now that I'm looking back at our memories, I realized that I haven't been truthful with myself this whole time. When we first held hands, I wasn't shy or blushing hard. I didn't feel anything because It didn't feel special. Same thing when he started giving me head pats or when he said I love you.
I've noticed that we talk less and less after we got together. I played dumb at first and denied it when he brought it up. I didn't want him to overthink things.
But now, I'm completely confused about my feelings. I feel nothing at all when I'm with him, only anxiousness when I have to talk to him face to face. I get annoyed when my friends always bring him up in every conversation, I find myself not wanting to talk to him at times.
Right now, I feel like I'm being unfair to him. I feel like I'm already hurting him with our now distant relationship. I want to break up with him, but wouldn't that just make him even more hurt? I don't know.
But I also don't know how much longer I can hold myself together.
He had rejected me once before, but that was because we weren't excatly familiar with each other. I understood completely, but still kept my feelings close to heart, I'm the style of person to have feelings for someone but have no intention on dating them. It sounds messed up, I know.
We talked a lot after that, and got to know each other a lot better. I was happy about that, satisfied even. But everything went south when he confessed and asked me to be his girlfriend.
At that time, I was already unsure about if I still have those feelings for him. But once I felt that I was completely overjoyed at that moment, I figured that I still liked him just as much as I did before.
Now that I'm looking back at our memories, I realized that I haven't been truthful with myself this whole time. When we first held hands, I wasn't shy or blushing hard. I didn't feel anything because It didn't feel special. Same thing when he started giving me head pats or when he said I love you.
I've noticed that we talk less and less after we got together. I played dumb at first and denied it when he brought it up. I didn't want him to overthink things.
But now, I'm completely confused about my feelings. I feel nothing at all when I'm with him, only anxiousness when I have to talk to him face to face. I get annoyed when my friends always bring him up in every conversation, I find myself not wanting to talk to him at times.
Right now, I feel like I'm being unfair to him. I feel like I'm already hurting him with our now distant relationship. I want to break up with him, but wouldn't that just make him even more hurt? I don't know.
But I also don't know how much longer I can hold myself together.
18-21