Vent. It's a little long.

I feel so terrible. I feel like a terrible person, kid, friend and everything in general. I don't know if anyone has the same experience, but I'm just tired. My parents and all relatives expect so much from me, but i know that i won't be able to meet their expectations and just fail them. I fail everything. My studying, because i don't remember anything from school and don't know what I'm doing even thought i pretend i do. I fail people who i consider friends; they are going through some terrible stuff and i can't even help them, i can't make them happy or make their burden easier. I get mad at myself, because i get sad when they finally start opening up to other people, I'm supposed to be happy for them, but i feel sad and worthless. I do nothing but whine and whine all days long.
I live in a normal family, my parents aren't abusive. I should be happy but I'm not. I hate my body. I can't say i don't like my life, but I'm certainly tired of it. Exhausted, even. I have no will or energy left. I don't know what to do.

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BigAssLeech · 31-35, M

I completely understand how you feel. I will say is this: It is not your responsibility to live up to the expectations that other people have created for you. You are your own person, experiencing life in a unique way, going through your own struggles, and trying to get by as best you can. I understand that depression and mental health can begin to feel like an obstacle—a physical entity or object that blocks you from being there for your loved ones, remembering things, or being able to focus on schoolwork. It siphons your emotional and physical energy, and sometimes just leaves you feeling worthless and hopeless.

What I encourage you to do is talk to someone you trust. Really talk to them. Make sure they're in a place to emotionally be able to handle it first, and then tell them exactly what you've said here, no matter how hard it is. If you don't want to say it, write a letter, or do it over text. This sounds like it's gotten really bad, and I think it would take a lot of weight off your shoulders to maybe even speak to a counselor.

Good luck, and I'm so sorry you're going through this 🫂

BrokenAbyss

I have felt very apathetic in times of depression and grieving or at ages where I needed to focus on myself. I was trying to be social when I needed to be introspective.

What are your passions?

What brings you joy?

It’s okay to focus on yourself. Perhaps you need more than you are getting out of life. You are your own key.

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