maybe its just me,,

as much as netball is my souce of comfort and i wont doubt that i love it so much and being picked into school team is honestly the best feeling ever,,, but when the game comes my time really shows how shit i am. there is 4 rounds with 4 quarters each and tru all these i only played a round with one quater only tmr will be the last match and to no suprise im not inside hehe but yk what its acc not as bad but i have to be sitting down ticking the scores it sounds not as bad but really all the time i didnt get to play i was ticking scores i didnt even get to sick down and cheer and relax haiss maybe this sounds like im asking for a lot but im really sorry.. its the shitiest feeling ever and the coach cld even give me hope then crush it haies i dont know i dont know im really not as worth as i think i was.. the gawdamn reality is so harsh sometimes it so uncomfortable i want to try and i do but i really see it so much rn how i see myself play and tbh i myslef wld not have picked me to play for the matches lol aiii ill work hard i want to prove u wrong but its not as easy to think about it all the time ,,,, bbutub thank you for just being here

Scribbles · 36-40, F

I often felt like that. I love and loved to play sports. I like games and being active.

But I really didn't like the politics of school sports and how crazy obsessive and nuts people get over every tiny thing. I blame the super competitive drive in school sports due to the money involved, sponsorships and fundraising, etc. Just give me a friendly competitive game anyday.

I got so fed up that after awhile I talked to my coaches and I would go to practices but I wouldn't play games. I got teased for it but I was happy. That's how I handled school sports. If you have a sports scholarship, you're probably screwed and have to play games.