Anxious
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Just a vent 🌪

My older sister thinks it’s wrong for me to have moved our youngest sister to the UK when she has no roots or relatives here, and that she would be better off in the US. More than once she has offered to have 8 go live with her back home so she can remain in her hometown, know her roots and be close to where she lived with our mom and be able to visit our mom’s grave.

IMO, since I’ve adopted my youngest sister, my UK family are now hers. Blood doesn’t equal family. My family here adore 8 and love her just as much (maybe more) as they love me. Our mom is gone, and moving away doesn’t destroy memories. I don’t feel close to my mom at her grave. I feel close to her whenever I think of her or feel her presence in my life. I hope 8 feels the same as she grows up.

Even if I had no family here, the decision to move was based off many things. Not least that 8 needed a change and to not have to live somewhere where certain streets and places were triggering to her. To be able to go anywhere here and it’s all new and exciting… that’s just what she needs to move on from her experiences.

She’s my kid now and wherever we are, we will make that home. Roots and blood have nothing on love.

It hurts for family members to remain unsupportive of our move and our new start. But I hope I’ve made the right choice for my little kiddo, and that she will agree as she gets older.
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ArminArlert · 22-25, M
Family will mostly always be a little judgmental, but it's usually coming from a place of love.

I think you have the right choice. Have you asked her what she thinks? I know what it's like to walk down a street everyday and be bombarded with triggering memories, and that's continued into adulthood for me. I think your sister is young enough were she will be able to make new memories and hopefully be able to heal from her past.
Raffiki · 22-25, F
@ArminArlert I’ve talked about it in as much detail as you can with an 8 year old. She says she prefers living here in the UK. Yeah, I would hate for that to be her life where she can’t even happily walk around town without those memories coming back. I hope that distance will allow her the space to heal and that physically moving away from it will aid in her mentally moving on.