I Am Upset

feeling poor and incapable. living in the farthest suburb of the whole city, got stuck in 2 traffic jams in the morning and was late for work as in every morning. 3 hrs on travel to and fro work for 6 years. graduated for 6 years but still living with my father, brother and his wife, at age 31. dinner with my father and his distant relatives who came back from abroad for holiday, and they have benefited a lot from the good welfare and system there, with their daughter having a promising career and family life. feeling doomed and trapped staying at a decaying city with no future, a future with no protection, an undesirable future for me as an individual. i feel bad i have not done well enough, well enough to escape.