I'm feeling all kind of self hatred right now

I feel so disappointed in myself because, even though I try to do my best... I always relapse.

And right now I'm incredibly stressed about everything going on in my life that I'm barely able to do anything... which adds to the stress and disappointment.

I tried to distract myself but my brain is on fire, so loud it makes my body recoil.

I am even ashamed to admit this because people go through worse things. But my brain wasn't able to stay still for the past few hours so I decided to write it.
I apologize for the negative energy.

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awildsheepschase

Hey.... just give yourself a helping hand in giving yourself a break.

I know and don't know how you feel but with some breathes you will come through.. and what you write now can be forgotten or remembered. Life is about choice even when you feel have none. :( It honestly sounds like you are more guilty of loving and caring than anything else ♥ Hugs, just say whatever is on your heart and mind it heals the spirit

AoNoSora

@awildsheepschase thank you... i will try 🥹

awildsheepschase

@AoNoSora That's all you can do is try and remember this, even if you don't feel it, you are your best friend the only one who knows whats going in that heart of yours. If you need to laugh at her or hug her.

AoNoSora

@awildsheepschase that's true.
I can say I am my own worst enemy... I am seldom good to myself.
You just reminded me of something someone said to me: talk to yourself like you would to your best friend.
I would try to encourage myself and praise myself and hold myself accountable instead of delving in a loophole of guilt and shame and especially especially forgive myself. That's the hardest part. It keeps me stuck.

awildsheepschase

@AoNoSora I think you can be accountable with yourself and your emotions without being hurtful to yourself. But I am no expect there, and I would choose myself if I am hurting myself to see how I am and find ways to wiggle myself into I will always just be myself and thats one choice I don't have in making, I am me, I am my struggles and my hurt, the world opens up when you forgive yourself.

AoNoSora

@awildsheepschase thank you so much.
It feels good to vent and recieve encouragement.

awildsheepschase

@AoNoSora We all have dark moments in our lives, sometimes we just need to vent out our hurts and you have nowhere to express your hurts. 🫂

AoNoSora

@awildsheepschase that s true
I appreciate your warmth and understanding 🥹

awildsheepschase

@AoNoSora You're welcome, I knew long ago I am nothing without my warmth, so thank you for seeing mine. ♥

AoNoSora

@awildsheepschase It is shining through.
I appreciate it

awildsheepschase

@AoNoSora Thank you Sora. I have a feeling yours is shining through just as much, if not more. 😊

AoNoSora

@awildsheepschase
Thank you... 🥹🙏🏼