Getting self reliant financially, emotionally, physically/materialistically, etc. helps a lot in handling difficult times in our life. And helps us take better decisions, actually it changes your perspective towards life.

I must mentally "slap" myself a lot to not stray with my thoughts off to memories that give me negative feelings. It's like yanking a dog's leash when it wants to go somewhere it shouldn't.

At least, you are capable of identifying the root of your inner turmoil and articulating it. It's already a big step out of the state of confusion.

Serotonin is amazing.

What else

ooh currently i'm in such a state does love help it go away?
the depression, autism and schizophrenia are currently kicking my ass even with the meds!