I know it's dramatic but part of me wants to fake my own death, run away to somewhere else and make a new identiy and have a new life

You can do all the rest without having to fake your own death. Go somewhere else and start a new life. If you don't want to be contacted by people in your current life, you can always decide to not answer their calls or letters or tell them you prefer they not contact you anymore and for them to respect your wishes. Faking your death can make you end up in jail.