CONFESSION TIME -- Your turn

Anyone remember EP confessions? I miss those.

Didn't use them much then...but now, would be nice.

I cheated on someone I loved, 2018.

Slowly after I became an alcoholic.

The very two things I despised and swore against....I became.

Sober until 22, virgin until 24 (2012). Had a good steady relationship until 2018.

I became disgusted with myself once I cheated. Can't look at myself or love myself. That was 5 years ago. Trying to drink myself to death because that's what I deserve.

Wouldn't you say? Think of the one that hurt you..... I am that person. They should suffer, yes? You hate them.

Seems only logical to hate myself.

I can only spend the rest of my life repenting.

It's just disgusting. I feel disgusting. The people who hurt you should feel disgusting.

We do.

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DrWatson · 70-79, M

A good person can do bad things. What you did does not define you.

Many people do what you did and then try to minimize the import of it. The fact that you are not doing so speaks volumes about your integrity, despite your lapse in integrity at the time.

You ask us to make an analogy with people who hurt us, that since we supposedly hate them, it makes sense for you to hate yourself. But there is another side to this:

Many times, after someone is hurt by a breach of trust in a relationship, the couple manages to work on the relationship (perhaps with counselling) and to heal. Many people do end up forgiving the ones who hurt them. And so.....likewise, it makes sense for you to eventually forgive yourself as well.

And I hope you eventually can.