Are you good at managing your expectations?
Something has occured and I asked my mum to help me with it.
She was annoyed at me today. And started on a rant about 1 person not saying anything to her when they saw her and the person she hoped wouldn't have much to say did. She said she had her face set (don't piss me off)
Her whole energy changed and went into what I would say was a mini rage. She doesn't realise how strong it is and really spoils the energy in any room when she is like that.
Anyways she keeps doing this bringing these things to me when my son is around which I have said I don't want.
He quickly ended up going into a tantrum and crying fit for 20 mins. She got herself into a complete faff.
What really upset me was the moment I said that I would talk to the person about what had gone on she said to me, this is why I don't want to tell you these things because I didn't want to make a fuss...
So why tell me at all?
So as my son continued to throw his tantrum, my mum went into this overcompensating mode where she wanted to try and find every toy, bottle, dummy, video, as a tool to try and calm him down.
But I reminded her it's a tantrum, I won't be pulled into his silliness.
So I sat him down and he thrashed and cried and slowly started to calm down.
Once he was quiet I put his favourite video on so I could clear up the clothes that was around him.
When I moved my mum leaned on the bed and started asking him "what was that all about?"
Please bare in mind he can't actually speak yet.
So he started up again.
In that instance she said she would go next door. So I had to stop what I was doing until he stopped this longer louder tantrum.
When I looked at the time I realised that in actual fact he was probably hungry. So when he finally calmed down I warmed up some dinner for him.
Finally perked up.
My mum then decided that she would leave as she had things to do.
I just sent her a message.
Because well I'm struggling with her.
Recent months have been really rough for a number of reasons.
Anyways her help has been reducing significantly over time.
Initially she was supposed to help walk my dog.
And then help me with any chores I couldn't get to (something she offered)
In exchange I said I would cook enough dinner for us all to eat and a little for her to take to work for lunch, as she's been really busy and not always able to eat.
She keeps complaining that she's tired, and under a lot of pressure at work.
So despite her end of day being 6pm she's been leaving later and later.
Sometimes calling last minute to say she couldn't make it round.
It's not that I can't do these things it's just last minute means I've been waiting for her and when I could have done X y and z at a time that would be more manageable now I'm suddenly rushing to get the pram down the stairs, the baby and the dog.
She's complaining that she needs to send me money for the food.
She's offered to buy clothes for my son but still hasn't been able to buy them.
She stopped helping with the chores when she came round, opting to just wanting to sit and hold my son until he goes to sleep.
I went into a panic about being able to afford the nursery fees for my son and she then told me that she had no savings and couldn't afford it. So she discussed taking a loan which I told her I wasn't comfortable with.
It was never meant to be her responsibility but I kind of thought I would be able to reach out for a little financial support if ever I needed it.
I've managed to sort it. Yes things are tight but it won't be forever.
This period of time has been really rough, and I'm not venting to dog my mum or ask for financial support. This is just a rant.
Because I kind of feel like I've had to manage my expectations and accept a lot of disappointments throughout all of this for varying reasons but I'm still pushing on because well I have to.
Life feels a bit like a let down currently, but I think the light at the end of the tunnel is close.
She was annoyed at me today. And started on a rant about 1 person not saying anything to her when they saw her and the person she hoped wouldn't have much to say did. She said she had her face set (don't piss me off)
Anyways she keeps doing this bringing these things to me when my son is around which I have said I don't want.
He quickly ended up going into a tantrum and crying fit for 20 mins. She got herself into a complete faff.
What really upset me was the moment I said that I would talk to the person about what had gone on she said to me, this is why I don't want to tell you these things because I didn't want to make a fuss...
So why tell me at all?
So as my son continued to throw his tantrum, my mum went into this overcompensating mode where she wanted to try and find every toy, bottle, dummy, video, as a tool to try and calm him down.
But I reminded her it's a tantrum, I won't be pulled into his silliness.
So I sat him down and he thrashed and cried and slowly started to calm down.
Once he was quiet I put his favourite video on so I could clear up the clothes that was around him.
When I moved my mum leaned on the bed and started asking him "what was that all about?"
Please bare in mind he can't actually speak yet.
So he started up again.
In that instance she said she would go next door. So I had to stop what I was doing until he stopped this longer louder tantrum.
When I looked at the time I realised that in actual fact he was probably hungry. So when he finally calmed down I warmed up some dinner for him.
Finally perked up.
My mum then decided that she would leave as she had things to do.
I just sent her a message.
Because well I'm struggling with her.
Recent months have been really rough for a number of reasons.
Anyways her help has been reducing significantly over time.
Initially she was supposed to help walk my dog.
And then help me with any chores I couldn't get to (something she offered)
In exchange I said I would cook enough dinner for us all to eat and a little for her to take to work for lunch, as she's been really busy and not always able to eat.
She keeps complaining that she's tired, and under a lot of pressure at work.
So despite her end of day being 6pm she's been leaving later and later.
Sometimes calling last minute to say she couldn't make it round.
It's not that I can't do these things it's just last minute means I've been waiting for her and when I could have done X y and z at a time that would be more manageable now I'm suddenly rushing to get the pram down the stairs, the baby and the dog.
She's complaining that she needs to send me money for the food.
She's offered to buy clothes for my son but still hasn't been able to buy them.
She stopped helping with the chores when she came round, opting to just wanting to sit and hold my son until he goes to sleep.
I went into a panic about being able to afford the nursery fees for my son and she then told me that she had no savings and couldn't afford it. So she discussed taking a loan which I told her I wasn't comfortable with.
It was never meant to be her responsibility but I kind of thought I would be able to reach out for a little financial support if ever I needed it.
I've managed to sort it. Yes things are tight but it won't be forever.
This period of time has been really rough, and I'm not venting to dog my mum or ask for financial support. This is just a rant.
Because I kind of feel like I've had to manage my expectations and accept a lot of disappointments throughout all of this for varying reasons but I'm still pushing on because well I have to.
Life feels a bit like a let down currently, but I think the light at the end of the tunnel is close.
31-35, F
