The reason why this time of the year often makes me feel low. Do you have any similar memories?
So yeah it's early November now and usually around this time it has always been feeling low for me. Yeah it's the Indian festival Diwali now and for some reason I personally feel quite low during Diwali every year. Yeah I just don't know why. It's a major festival for most Indians but I just end up feeling low during this time so yeah roughly late October to early November which is when usually Diwali falls. Yeah compared to Dussehra and Durga puja which was in mid to late October this year, I just feel them better compared to Diwali. I always feel good or positive during Durga puja which is our major Bengali festival. Yeah I live in the city Bangalore in India not Bengal but still so many Durga puja pandals in here, eating biryani from stalls, having ice gola and also we had a Chennai trip this Dussehra time but Diwali just feels bland to me. And it's not just a now thing but I remember back when I was in 6th grade too suddenly feeling low for no reason on the last day of Diwali and crying a lot. Even now at 25, Diwali doesn't feel pleasant.
Idk whether it's because the year is ending and my birthday is not far away(it's on 22nd December) but yeah I feel this a lot. Also in our area Munnekolala and basically most of India, people burst fire crackers on Diwali and they just annoy me and are just too loud. I am also scared to burst crackers and never burst them on Diwali as I remember as a very little kid in Falakata in West Bengal where my maternal grandpa lives and just 110 km away from my hometown Siliguri, my youngest aunt was bursting crackers during Diwali and it burst on her hand and she got injuries on her hand and she cried. Seeing that, to this day I don't burst crackers on Diwalis. So yeah I don't really participate in this festival much like I do during Durga puja or Holi. The loud sounds makes me feel annoyed. It's hard to walk on the streets too as people are bursting them. So maybe that's why I feel low as I don't participate in the festival much except the diyas lit in our home and the fact that year is ending and my birthday isnt far and unlike Durga puja where I pandal hop and go to places, Diwali is mostly in home. Yes we Bengalis have Kali Puja at night but it's in a small Government school hall in our area Munnekolala and it's crowded often unlike the open air Durga puja and there is no stalls and less space around. Do you feel it's a bad thing tho? Do you also have any similar memories with any festival?
Idk whether it's because the year is ending and my birthday is not far away(it's on 22nd December) but yeah I feel this a lot. Also in our area Munnekolala and basically most of India, people burst fire crackers on Diwali and they just annoy me and are just too loud. I am also scared to burst crackers and never burst them on Diwali as I remember as a very little kid in Falakata in West Bengal where my maternal grandpa lives and just 110 km away from my hometown Siliguri, my youngest aunt was bursting crackers during Diwali and it burst on her hand and she got injuries on her hand and she cried. Seeing that, to this day I don't burst crackers on Diwalis. So yeah I don't really participate in this festival much like I do during Durga puja or Holi. The loud sounds makes me feel annoyed. It's hard to walk on the streets too as people are bursting them. So maybe that's why I feel low as I don't participate in the festival much except the diyas lit in our home and the fact that year is ending and my birthday isnt far and unlike Durga puja where I pandal hop and go to places, Diwali is mostly in home. Yes we Bengalis have Kali Puja at night but it's in a small Government school hall in our area Munnekolala and it's crowded often unlike the open air Durga puja and there is no stalls and less space around. Do you feel it's a bad thing tho? Do you also have any similar memories with any festival?
22-25, M
