More changes I think
Yesterday I went out with the new friend for the second time. It was really nice. We listened to music, we chatted about everything, we sat with stray dogs (They joined us in an outside cafe). We attempted to watch a movie but wifi was being weird so we watched a few videos then went for a walk we did a lot of things.
It was like everything was aligned together. My body allowed me to enjoy my time with no unnecessary drama (because I started taking my supplements) & the weather was warm. I haven't stayed outside as late as I did yesterday without getting tired in so long!!
I don't know if him being younger than me is also making me feel younger around him but it's very possible. I do feel carefree around him.
I feel that I opened a portal into a different world, suddenly I have this friend who's willing to listen to all the shit in my head, he's not homophobic, he prefers animals over humans, he's not judgemental towards me or anyone.
Those are things I thought I'd never find where I live ever. I've lost all hope. Even with my best friend there are a lot of things I rather not share with him including therapy actually. Even my own family don't know about it for personal reasons.
But with this friend everything is different and possible. The compatibility between us is insane. The music taste even is the same we both listen to anything we like in basically any language. We talked about roleplay and we both have our own worlds in it, it's weird that I'm suddenly talking about my characters and stuff with someone who first doesn't think I'm weird and second he's actually curious to hear more. He let me in his world too and he talked about his characters.
I now have a lot of ideas of things we can do. Next time we're going to hang out in the morning. And on another time I'm thinking about going somewhere where I can work and he can study while we listen to music. I'm also thinking about watching a Ryan Gosling movie with him. We talked about the movie Blade Runner 2049 last time. I'm thinking we should watch Drive. We're also supposed to watch 8mm, a Nicolas Cage movie.
I realize I could be being over-excited but I don't care. I literally never had a friend this interesting in my offline life. Someone I can do a lot of cool stuff with that I had nobody ever willing to do them with me. For instance my best friend hates walking so I had to do it alone the entire summer. And the list goes on. Now I have an opportunity to be myself but with a friend. And I'm going to take it.
It was like everything was aligned together. My body allowed me to enjoy my time with no unnecessary drama (because I started taking my supplements) & the weather was warm. I haven't stayed outside as late as I did yesterday without getting tired in so long!!
I don't know if him being younger than me is also making me feel younger around him but it's very possible. I do feel carefree around him.
I feel that I opened a portal into a different world, suddenly I have this friend who's willing to listen to all the shit in my head, he's not homophobic, he prefers animals over humans, he's not judgemental towards me or anyone.
Those are things I thought I'd never find where I live ever. I've lost all hope. Even with my best friend there are a lot of things I rather not share with him including therapy actually. Even my own family don't know about it for personal reasons.
But with this friend everything is different and possible. The compatibility between us is insane. The music taste even is the same we both listen to anything we like in basically any language. We talked about roleplay and we both have our own worlds in it, it's weird that I'm suddenly talking about my characters and stuff with someone who first doesn't think I'm weird and second he's actually curious to hear more. He let me in his world too and he talked about his characters.
I now have a lot of ideas of things we can do. Next time we're going to hang out in the morning. And on another time I'm thinking about going somewhere where I can work and he can study while we listen to music. I'm also thinking about watching a Ryan Gosling movie with him. We talked about the movie Blade Runner 2049 last time. I'm thinking we should watch Drive. We're also supposed to watch 8mm, a Nicolas Cage movie.
I realize I could be being over-excited but I don't care. I literally never had a friend this interesting in my offline life. Someone I can do a lot of cool stuff with that I had nobody ever willing to do them with me. For instance my best friend hates walking so I had to do it alone the entire summer. And the list goes on. Now I have an opportunity to be myself but with a friend. And I'm going to take it.
31-35, M
