I'm usually taking responsibility for my actions but right now I can't help it

But think how every guy I've been with been injecting me with generous dosages of sorrow. Or maybe I'm just absorbent.
I'll just stay away. But I felt like I was doing well and then I stupidly slept with that guy. I so much regret that.
I didn't care about myself. I feel bad for not treating me right.
Anyways, I'm just mumbling around.