I want to tell my story.
Ten years ago I have lost my man. We were together for 5 years, it's been the biggest relationship of my life.
We broke up and 6 months later he learnt he had cancer. He moved back with me, along with his mother. We stayed like that for another couple of months and I couldn't do it. So I moved to another little basement apartment nearby.
He went through a series of therapies but didn't make it. I was there in the room when he died.
Ever since I've been running. Running from everything actually, and especially running from love, but not only. I've been just sleeping around with anyone just to feel held and to not bare the weight alone. But it only gets worse.
So a couple of years ago I decided enough is enough and I'm changing everything. I quit the drugs, alcohol, sleeping around, I even became a vegetarian. I went to Nepal for meditations, I stayed a year in China putting myself into a very hard schedule and training, continuously working in my free time on affirmations and a ton of other things.
Loss is hard. Sometimes life gets pretty hard. I don't know if I can be ever fully open to love again.
I'm now releasing everything. I am releasing my obsession towards letting go and my obsession towards release too. I'm releasing my fear of holding onto anything. I forgive myself and everyone else, I'm speaking the words slowly, clearly, I'm sorry, thank you..
Here. Take this.
We broke up and 6 months later he learnt he had cancer. He moved back with me, along with his mother. We stayed like that for another couple of months and I couldn't do it. So I moved to another little basement apartment nearby.
He went through a series of therapies but didn't make it. I was there in the room when he died.
Ever since I've been running. Running from everything actually, and especially running from love, but not only. I've been just sleeping around with anyone just to feel held and to not bare the weight alone. But it only gets worse.
So a couple of years ago I decided enough is enough and I'm changing everything. I quit the drugs, alcohol, sleeping around, I even became a vegetarian. I went to Nepal for meditations, I stayed a year in China putting myself into a very hard schedule and training, continuously working in my free time on affirmations and a ton of other things.
Loss is hard. Sometimes life gets pretty hard. I don't know if I can be ever fully open to love again.
I'm now releasing everything. I am releasing my obsession towards letting go and my obsession towards release too. I'm releasing my fear of holding onto anything. I forgive myself and everyone else, I'm speaking the words slowly, clearly, I'm sorry, thank you..
Here. Take this.
