He also, okay, I have to admit was pretty intolerant weirdly, like transphobic and conservative, and a little subtly sexist

I don't know why I ignore these things and think it will be okay. But it's good to look at these things because if I'm with someone, I'd like our values to match

In fact, they must.

This page is a permanent link to the reply below and its nested replies. See all post replies »

Dolimyte · 41-45, M

Yeah, you gotta watch out for those red flags. It can be hard to notice. I think when we are with someone we want to give them the benefit of the doubt or the opportunity to improve. Nobody is perfect so it can be hard to know what to tolerate.

caccoon · 36-40

@Dolimyte yeah, definitely. I always wanna wait and see if people change, but I also think people change best outside of relationships. So hopefully he can make some progress on his own