If i put someone down as a reference, should i tell them?

I really dont want to bc im embarrassed by the new job im applying for and im scared she'll judge me (even tho shes really sweet and amazing). They probably wont even call right? Do they even call references? I dont want to tell her and then they dont even call and i dont get the job and i just look stupid...but i dont want them on the, off chance, to call and shes just dumbfounded bc i didnt let her know...ugh I hate references, i really didnt want to put anyone but it required one from a previous job 🙄😠