why do some men not initiate

It's really frustrating. I been with my husband for four years and I can literally count on one hand how many times he's initiated. I can't help but feel a little unhappy. I have never experienced this with anyone. How do I deal with this because I am getting really fed up with my marriage.

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Ananke · 26-30, F

Have you had a serious conversation about it with him? I never initiated in my last relationship because I had huge anxiety and guilt around sex things stemming from bad experiences. Not saying your guy has the same but you never know until you ask.

DidIHurtYourFeelings · F

I have asked him a lot of times in the beginning I used to feel hurt or think it was me but it became clear it was him so now I just do everything. It gets old :/

Ananke · 26-30, F

What did he say about it? @DidIHurtYourFeelings:

DidIHurtYourFeelings · F

@Hush92: he doesn't say much. I think he might be embarrassed or just flat out lazy

Ananke · 26-30, F

Hmmm yeah you need to get him to open up about it. Maybe try couples counseling! That can be good for figuring out these things. @DidIHurtYourFeelings: