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The talent of giving up.

While I do have multiple abilities that can benefit from practice, life happens and I give up on them. Many people would do anything to have the same opportunities and leanings.

Mostly grief stands in my way.

I used to sing, stopped when my sister passed away.

I used to write exquisite classic arabic poetry that was published, stopped because a relationship crumbled.

I learnt gymnastics and playing the piano, stopped when my grandparents passed away.

I used to paint and sketch, stopped as the grief over Ibahnini took its course.

Whenever I try engaging that, all I feel is pain so I don't bother. Other givers know how to transform that pain to gifts, I move away and find something else in me to tie to life.

I do miss what I used to do and to be, sometimes.
GeistInTheMachine · 31-35, M
I get so fed up and furious with everything I give up. Then I feel a sick, demented sort of liberation. It comes full circle, like a stack oveflow error. The only think that keeps me around sometimes must be the sheer hatred of my enemies. I run on spite now like a demonic man-shaped machine.
GeistInTheMachine · 31-35, M
@sspec I need to leave this State when Ican. It has brougt me Hell on Earth for years.
GeistInTheMachine · 31-35, M
@sspec Let's see.
Giving up is the Best of All.

Ultimately, we all have to do. Some are enforced.
Blessed are those who indulge willingly.
Miram · 31-35, F
Another reason is my perfectionism tendencies. I focus on details to the point that I dismiss the whole work and consider it trash.

I seem to be able to work on that lately.
GeistInTheMachine · 31-35, M
@Miram I feel you. We're a bit a like. I am sorry for that. Lol.
Miram · 31-35, F
@GeistInTheMachine

God has good sense of humor. I will never feel alone.
GeistInTheMachine · 31-35, M
@Miram Amen.
alan20 · M
I do know someone else like that. She calls herself the girl who ran away. We all have our limits not least myself. We cope in whatever way we can. Like joking about things to show how clever we are or suppressing or repressing memories.
SW-User
I gave up too, it can be a freeing thing.
Miram · 31-35, F
@SW-User It can,and very comforting. Like a part of yourself that died and now it is time for a rebirth
SW-User
@Miram Well put, a tabula rasa
rrraksamam · 31-35, M
Never give up
Miram · 31-35, F
@rrraksamam

I already did, multiple times😅
caccoon · 36-40
Sometimes there is an ebb and flow, and the things we do and can do in life are often affected by what's going on... As you've identified. 💙

I find when I am very low mood, I cannot create well

I hope in the future you can get back to some of these things, should you want to
Unquestioned · 70-79, M
Maybe a brand new hobby will help you to overcome.
Miram · 31-35, F
@Unquestioned

That's probably the only healthy way I can manage, staying occupied.

 
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