Worried about not feeling enough

I am concerned with how fine I feel about everything going on in my life right now. I lost one partner, and I'm probably going to lose the other one, and I'm just kind of okay with that. I guess i can only be told that it would be better if I was her and that he wished I was her so many times before you stop caring. It's so crazy to me.
Bf has been a mess for weeks over this breakup, and I've been there every step of the way. Yet he tells me my lips aren't as soft as hers. His hands don't fit on my waist like they did hers (maybe it's the 100lbs difference lol). He prefered when she would sit in the front seat. Cuddling with her is more comfortable.
We're spending some time apart. I don't know if I want to continue, but I don't think he realizes how hurtful it is when he says things like that. It feels horrible.