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Picklebobble2 · 56-60, M
[i]Bad Sir Brian Botany by A.A.Milne[/i]
Sir Brian had a Battleaxe with great big knobs on
He went about the villagers and blipped them on the head !
On Wednesday and on Saturday, but mostly on the latter day.
He called on all the cottages and this is what he said.
[b]"I am Sir Brian ![/b] ting ling !
[b]"I am Sir Brian !"[/b] rat tat !
[b]"I am Sir Brian ! As bold as a Lion ![/b]
[b]"Take that ! And that ! And that ![/b]
Sir Brian had a pair of boots with great big spurs on.
A fighting pair of which he was particularly fond.
On Tuesday and on Friday, just to make the street look tidy,
He'd collect passing villagers and kick them in the pond !
[b]"I am Sir Brian ![/b] sper-lash !
[b]"I am Sir Brian ![/b] sper-losh !
[b]"I am Sir Brian ! As bold as a Lion ![/b]
[b]"Anyone else for a wash ?"[/b]
Well. Sir Brian woke one morning and couldn't find his Battleaxe !
He walked into the village in his second pair of boots !
He had gone a hundred paces when the street was full of faces
And the villagers were round him with ironical salutes !
[b]"You are Sir Brian ? My my !"[/b]
[b]"You are Sir Brian ? Dear dear !"[/b]
[b]"You are Sir Brian ? As bold as a Lion ?"[/b]
[b]"Delighted to meet you here !"[/b]
Sir Brian went a journey !
And he found a lot of Duckweed !
They pulled him out and dried him and they blipped him on the head !
They took him by the britches and threw him into ditches !
They held him under waterfalls and this is what they said.
[b]"You are Sir Brian ! Don't laugh !"[/b]
[b]"You are Sir Brian ? Don't cry !"[/b]
[b]"You are Sir Brian !"[/b]
[b]"As bold as a Lion !"[/b]
[b]"Sir Brian the Lion, Goodbye !"[/b]
Well, Sir Brian struggled home again. And chopped up his Battleaxe !
Sir Brian took his fighting boots and threw them on the fire !
He is quite a different person now he hasn't got his spurs on
And he goes about the village as B. Botany Esquire.
[b]"I am Sir Brian ? Oh no !"[/b]
[b]"I am Sir Brian ? Whose he ?"[/b]
[b]"I haven't any title. I'm Botany !"[/b]
[b]"Plain Mr. Botany B !"[/b]
Sir Brian had a Battleaxe with great big knobs on
He went about the villagers and blipped them on the head !
On Wednesday and on Saturday, but mostly on the latter day.
He called on all the cottages and this is what he said.
[b]"I am Sir Brian ![/b] ting ling !
[b]"I am Sir Brian !"[/b] rat tat !
[b]"I am Sir Brian ! As bold as a Lion ![/b]
[b]"Take that ! And that ! And that ![/b]
Sir Brian had a pair of boots with great big spurs on.
A fighting pair of which he was particularly fond.
On Tuesday and on Friday, just to make the street look tidy,
He'd collect passing villagers and kick them in the pond !
[b]"I am Sir Brian ![/b] sper-lash !
[b]"I am Sir Brian ![/b] sper-losh !
[b]"I am Sir Brian ! As bold as a Lion ![/b]
[b]"Anyone else for a wash ?"[/b]
Well. Sir Brian woke one morning and couldn't find his Battleaxe !
He walked into the village in his second pair of boots !
He had gone a hundred paces when the street was full of faces
And the villagers were round him with ironical salutes !
[b]"You are Sir Brian ? My my !"[/b]
[b]"You are Sir Brian ? Dear dear !"[/b]
[b]"You are Sir Brian ? As bold as a Lion ?"[/b]
[b]"Delighted to meet you here !"[/b]
Sir Brian went a journey !
And he found a lot of Duckweed !
They pulled him out and dried him and they blipped him on the head !
They took him by the britches and threw him into ditches !
They held him under waterfalls and this is what they said.
[b]"You are Sir Brian ! Don't laugh !"[/b]
[b]"You are Sir Brian ? Don't cry !"[/b]
[b]"You are Sir Brian !"[/b]
[b]"As bold as a Lion !"[/b]
[b]"Sir Brian the Lion, Goodbye !"[/b]
Well, Sir Brian struggled home again. And chopped up his Battleaxe !
Sir Brian took his fighting boots and threw them on the fire !
He is quite a different person now he hasn't got his spurs on
And he goes about the village as B. Botany Esquire.
[b]"I am Sir Brian ? Oh no !"[/b]
[b]"I am Sir Brian ? Whose he ?"[/b]
[b]"I haven't any title. I'm Botany !"[/b]
[b]"Plain Mr. Botany B !"[/b]
Picklebobble2 · 56-60, M
[b]The King's breakfast by A.A.Milne[/b]
The King asked the Queen, and the Queen asked the Dairymaid
[b]"Could we have some butter for the royal slice of bread ?"[/b]
The Dairymaid said [b]"Certainly ! I'll go and tell the Cow now before she goes to bed !"[/b]
The Dairymaid, she curtsied and went to see the Alderney
[b]"Don't forget the butter for the royal slice of bread !"[/b]
The Alderney, said sleepily, [b]You'd better tell his Majesty, that many people nowadays like Marmalade instead !"[/b]
The Dairymaid said [b]"Fancy !"[/b] and went to her Majesty, she curtsied most politely then turned a little red.
[b]"Excuse me your Majesty, for taking of the liberty, but Marmalade is tasty if very thickly spread !"[/b]
The Queen said [b]"Oh ! Really ?"[/b] and went to his Majesty
[b]"Talking of the butter for the royal slice of bread, many people nowadays think that Marmalade is nicer. Would you like to try a little Marmalade instead ?"[/b]
The King said [b]"Oh bother !"[/b] and then he sobbed [b]"Oh deary me ![/b] and went back to bed !
[b]"Nobody[/b] he said,[b]could call me a fussy man. I only want a little bit of butter for my bread !"[/b]
The Queen said [b]"There there !"[/b] and went to the Dairymaid
The Dairymaid said [b]"There there"[/b] and went to the shed.
The Cow said [b]"There there ! I didn't really mean it ! Here's milk for his Porridge AND butter for his bread ![/b]
The Queen took the butter and went to show his Majesty.
The King smiled and said [b]"Butter eh ?"[/b] and bounced out of bed !
[b]"Nobody !"[/b] he smiled as he kissed her tenderly.
[b]"Nobody !"[/b] he laughed as he slid down the bannister !
[b]"Nobody[/b] he said [b]Could call me a fussy man !.....But i DO like a little bit of butter on my bread !"[/b]
The King asked the Queen, and the Queen asked the Dairymaid
[b]"Could we have some butter for the royal slice of bread ?"[/b]
The Dairymaid said [b]"Certainly ! I'll go and tell the Cow now before she goes to bed !"[/b]
The Dairymaid, she curtsied and went to see the Alderney
[b]"Don't forget the butter for the royal slice of bread !"[/b]
The Alderney, said sleepily, [b]You'd better tell his Majesty, that many people nowadays like Marmalade instead !"[/b]
The Dairymaid said [b]"Fancy !"[/b] and went to her Majesty, she curtsied most politely then turned a little red.
[b]"Excuse me your Majesty, for taking of the liberty, but Marmalade is tasty if very thickly spread !"[/b]
The Queen said [b]"Oh ! Really ?"[/b] and went to his Majesty
[b]"Talking of the butter for the royal slice of bread, many people nowadays think that Marmalade is nicer. Would you like to try a little Marmalade instead ?"[/b]
The King said [b]"Oh bother !"[/b] and then he sobbed [b]"Oh deary me ![/b] and went back to bed !
[b]"Nobody[/b] he said,[b]could call me a fussy man. I only want a little bit of butter for my bread !"[/b]
The Queen said [b]"There there !"[/b] and went to the Dairymaid
The Dairymaid said [b]"There there"[/b] and went to the shed.
The Cow said [b]"There there ! I didn't really mean it ! Here's milk for his Porridge AND butter for his bread ![/b]
The Queen took the butter and went to show his Majesty.
The King smiled and said [b]"Butter eh ?"[/b] and bounced out of bed !
[b]"Nobody !"[/b] he smiled as he kissed her tenderly.
[b]"Nobody !"[/b] he laughed as he slid down the bannister !
[b]"Nobody[/b] he said [b]Could call me a fussy man !.....But i DO like a little bit of butter on my bread !"[/b]
DukeOfEarle · M
Little Jack Horner
Sat in his corner
Eating his Christmas pie
Stuck in his thumb
Pulled out a plum
And said “Holy shit am I high!” @TheOneyouwerewarnedabout
Sat in his corner
Eating his Christmas pie
Stuck in his thumb
Pulled out a plum
And said “Holy shit am I high!” @TheOneyouwerewarnedabout
DukeOfEarle · M
@TheOneyouwerewarnedabout Fuck...forgot to mention that was George Carlin. Gotta give due where it’s due...
DukeOfEarle · M
TheOneyouwerewarnedabout · 41-45, MVIP
@DukeOfEarle ooh ooh ...
Mary had a little lamb with fleece as black as charcoal..
Everytime it jumped the fence, sparks flew out its asshole 😁
Mary had a little lamb with fleece as black as charcoal..
Everytime it jumped the fence, sparks flew out its asshole 😁
OogieBoogie · F
@TheOneyouwerewarnedabout hahahahah - I'm telling my daufhter this one! 🤣
SW-User
[center]an enemy
that is me
in all I see
my enemy
they'll still say hi
someone I knew
I'll wave and sigh
and wonder who
they see
not me
just a lie
just some guy
I used to be
now my enemy
is all I see
an enemy
that is me
that is you[/center]
that is me
in all I see
my enemy
they'll still say hi
someone I knew
I'll wave and sigh
and wonder who
they see
not me
just a lie
just some guy
I used to be
now my enemy
is all I see
an enemy
that is me
that is you[/center]
DukeOfEarle · M
Mary Mary quite contrary
How does your garden grow?
Just like the bells and cockle shells
And an acre and a 1/2 of killer shit!!
How does your garden grow?
Just like the bells and cockle shells
And an acre and a 1/2 of killer shit!!
OogieBoogie · F
Coo coo cachoo 😊