Was I in the wrong?

Nanny has worked with us for 4 years and the past year has been eventful. She developed crohns and my husband and I separated. She now works between our two homes.
My ex and I are not on good terms at the minute.

Today my nanny texted to say she had a migraine and wouldn't be able to work. She was meant to be at my ex's house but he wasn't answering her call. These were the texts -

Her-Hi Jen. Been sick and have a terrible migraine so won't be able to work today. I know I am meant to be at Mark's but can't get hold of him so thought I would let you know.

Me- Oh you poor thing. Hope you feel better soon.

Me- Can you let me know when Mark replies to you please? So I know whether to go and pick Archie (child) up from school?

She then took ages to respond and finally said-

'Jen. I am not feeling well. I texted you as I needed you to try and get hold of Mark to make him aware of the situation and my being ill. I don't want to be the go between. Please can you sort this between you today?'

Who was out of line here? I am pretty shocked.

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SW-User

She was not feeling well. It was clear she was letting you know that she tried but could not reach your husband. To ask her to let you know when she reached your husband is out of line.

She said she is not the go between and she was right. I don’t blame her for being rude. She was crippled with a migraine and you were Involving her in whatever is going on with your husband. This is shit she does not have to deal with.

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Jenni855 · 36-40, F

@SW-User I still think she could have worded it nicer, you will see I did express sympathy in my text

SW-User

@Jenni855 hollow words cause you clearly did not recognise that she was in server pain. Instead you brought the focus to your own issue

Jenni855 · 36-40, F

@SW-User No I didn't, I just asked that she let me know if he got in touch with her

Awfullybrave · F

🤔🤔 I personally think she over reacted. First if all she is been with you for 4 years, and you simply asked her to text you when she hears from your ex. Something doesn't sounds right. Sick or not sick that's not how you speak to your boss. Something isn't right 🤔🤔🤔

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Awfullybrave · F

@Jenni855 Is she normally rude? Is that normal behaviour?

Jenni855 · 36-40, F

@Awfullybrave No. She is very shy normally and sweet 😐

Awfullybrave · F

@Jenni855 how did it end up with your ex? I think maybe you need to have a word with her when you see her but I would investigate a bit further if I was you

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Jenni855 · 36-40, F

@waleskinder Well I thought what she said was rude

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Jenni855 · 36-40, F

@waleskinder I am angry at her tone. Archie was picked up from school as Mark arranged cover but there was no need for her rudeness

Eddiesolds · 61-69, M

Migraines arent good.id say maybe you call your ex.it will only take a minute. She just cant function today.I know I cant.

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Eddiesolds · 61-69, M

@Jenni855 I know. I'm so sorry

greenmountaingal · 70-79, F

@Jenni855 Is anything going on between her and your husband? Don't mean to be cynical here, but it might explain her critical tone and your degree of irritation about it.

Jenni855 · 36-40, F

@greenmountaingal Romantic you mean? I doubt it. He has a girlfriend who he is 'blissfully' in love with. I get the sense he and nanny don't always get along though although he/she never say anything to me about it.

curiosi · 61-69, F

You were, she has a migraine and couldn't be available, you didn't accept that.

Jenni855 · 36-40, F

@curiosi I did accept she couldn't work and expressed sympathy

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