My sister and I don’t see eye to eye on gender issues

She has a very simplified idea about sex and gender. I cringe because she said she will not refer to someone who is one sex as the opposite sex in like terms of pronouns and forms of address. She will use whatever names they call themselves but that’s it. She said besides intersex people like me who are both sexes, there is male and female. For intersex people she will go with whichever sex or gender they choose for themselves and how they introduce themselves. I chose to stay living as a female. But my sister and family think if you are intersex then you should be able to choose which sex you want male or female. But they have a hard time grasping living as both or neither. My sister thinks they/them pronouns for singular gender neutral people is grammatically incorrect. And she thinks transgenderism is a mental illness and delusion. I think it’s neurological and hormonal. My sister believes in only ( with the exception of intersex folks) there are only two genders. She thinks these other gender options like non binary, gender neutral, etc. are ridiculous. Basically she said for most people pull down your own pants and see what you have got in between your legs. That’s cringeworthy. I am somewhere in the middle I believe there are more than two genders maybe four to six options would suffice but not dozens of gender identities. There have always been androgynous, intersex, and transgender people around. I think of it as natural human diversity.. granted I understand why a biological female would still feel uncomfortable with a biological male in say intimate spaces like bathrooms, dressing and changing rooms, and locker rooms. That’s just a natural reaction. Particularly with someone who has sexually assaulted by a male. And she said she is sick of seeing bearded “ ladies” in the women’s bathroom. She said it’s not actual females with beards due to a hormone imbalance. Like polycystic ovary syndrome. But males with beards and traditionally women's clothes who for example at her work are in the women's facilities. Yes I understand her discomfort completely. She said being intersex was not my fault or anyone’s fault and she understands intersex people going to the facilities they most closely resemble. It’s not even the cross dressing that gets her it’s biological males going into female spaces. She told me it makes her nervous and freaks her out. She is sick of the transgender push on society. She says intersex people at least have a biological condition through no fault of our own. It’s not a mental illness and she thinks calling a she a he or he a she is just feeding into the delusion. I tried explaining to her there are different kinds of transsexuals. The big bearded ladies if you will are probably just autogynephiles. They are aroused by the thought of themselves as women and honestly should be in a third space. There are homosexual transsexuals or sexual inverts who pose no threat to women because they are not attracted to females and have feminized sexuality and are socially and sexually submissive. Those are the ones who deserve the gender identity protections. They are women neurologically and psychologically. Men in dresses however are creeping on women’s spaces and it is disgusting. I’m a hermaphrodite for Christs sake and I don’t want a huge linebacker of a male coming to female facilities. It’s fucking scary. Ok so maybe do have some common ground on gender issues but not everything. I would still refer a trans or non binary person as to what they want to be called. It’s no skin off my back. But yeah big dudes in the womens restrooms I have been in that situation it is pretty uncomfortable.