Lesbian advice

Hello people 🦕

If you could give some advice, I would really appreciate it 😌

So I'm originally from another country that culturally does not support sapphic relationships, but the country I live in now is very tolerant and progressive. When I first came out to my parents I expected them to be supportive, they acted supportive when I dated a girl but after we broke up they kept telling me I was straight and will find a man and that I'm just "playing about". So my family thinks same sex relationships are unnatural and mostly avoid the topic all together. Recently, I came across a gay couple holding hands and I was like "wow how cute I want a relationship like that some day" and my brother started saying a bunch of him phobic slurs and my mother who was there told me to be silent. This made me distressed. Having struggled with relationships in the future and loving my straight best friend messily for 2 years, I have not had a good gay experience so far. I feel overwhelmed, when I see gay couples kissing because I feel I will never have what they have. Don't get me wrong I'm in a good place to be, happy with myself and very optimistic but I just feel like I won't find girls I like as I'm stuck with a family that is not supportive for 2 years because I'm 16 and don't financially have the power to move yet but I work and study. I keep myself occupied, but I just feel like I can't properly find the partner I want and make a move on anyone till I'm 18. How can I deal with it?

All advice appreciated and have a good day folks
🤍🧩🏳️‍🌈

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LoneGirl97 · 26-30, F

That sounds very familiar. I have hopes for you. I don't think I will find anyone. Everyone is interested here in other things. My experiences have not been positive either

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MilayaDetka161 · 18-21, F

@LoneGirl97 Also what happened to you?

LoneGirl97 · 26-30, F

@MilayaDetka161 my dating attempts did not work. The ones I dated did not give me enough time or underdtanding, did not come to form a lasting relationship with any. Today I am alone. I have been so the couple of past years because I don't see myself belonging with people or anywhere. I went on a night out yesterday and I was too sober to enjoy it. I have my own health reasons. My mother had cardiac arrest 3 months ago. I don't want to follow her with abuse of alcohol, yet I did not want to br alone tgis weekend as I just recently moved on my own. I did not see the appeal in a loud night club with my friend talking about her one night stands and asking me over and over if I am sure I am not bi because she can't comprehend someone not being like her and her friends. I just stayed quiet and smiled. I don't know. Many things are not great. I have been pushing away this feeling for a long while. I have tried talking to guys but I notice this: they open with allusions to having intimate relationship, they focus on what they want to get out of it, they don't want to know anything about me, they don't care if I want it or not, it's all about them making a conquer. And yes, I have met women like that too. Did not go anywhere

MilayaDetka161 · 18-21, F

@LoneGirl97 You are so right, it's sad that many people have some ulterior motive when it comes to dating anyone. I think you need new friends someone that understands you and at least accepts and respects you for who you are. Unlike the people you encounter. And what happened to your mother is very sad , I imagine how difficult it must be for you.

Take care tho 🤍🍙🌈

Uniquennmc04 · 36-40, F

Hello,

I had the same issue when I was your age (highly religious family). At this point just do the best you can & make every effort to get away from your family's toxic view of homosexuals. Just continue to strive to move on to do better for yourself & pursue what/who will make you happy. In the mean time ignore the phobic comments & do not let them determine who you can/cannot be. Never let the opinions of others stop you from living your best life. 🙂

MilayaDetka161 · 18-21, F

@Uniquennmc04
Thank you very much for your advice 🧩💞

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MilayaDetka161 · 18-21, F

@vexer6 Thank you for your concern, and no I am not afraid of them just want to have a good relationship with them. We're close and they treat me really well so I suppose if I move out and get a same sex partner when I'm if age they may slowly get the gist of it.

vexer6 · 31-35, M

@MilayaDetka161 OK good to know.

LoneGirl97 · 26-30, F

@vexer6 there are indeed some crazy parents out there. I met a girl once that ran away from home and moved countries. Her father burned her end of school diploma and she is stuck doing factory work. Her mother beat her and she has marks on her body. I can understand though wanting to be on good terms with parents and having your relationship approved. I really struggled with my father not accepting me and having judgments but at the end of the day he loves me

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