Why is that our siblings can hardly become our best friends and we find comfort in others around us than at home?

Does it make sense?

nick030 · 31-35, M

In my case, I was the youngest, so I was pretty annoying. My other three sisters hardly got along because of rivalry.. Now that they are all married, we miss each other.. Funny how relationships work.

hartfire

@nick030 Yep, it's hard.
The youngest only wants to be loved, like all kids.
The older kids want the same.
Not getting needs met is a set up for conflict.
But the saddest thing about dysfunctional parents is that they don't know how to love.
I define love as that which consciously cares for the well being of life.
So if a person's actions cause neglect or harm it is because they don't know how to love,
and that usually goes back to their parents, whether they're aware of it or not.

The good news is that
as adults we can choose to find ways of healing our wounds
and learning how to love well.

hartfire

That's common in dysfunctional families.

Survivors need to create a new "family" of friends who are either functional or who have found various means to heal themselves.

Donotfolowme · 51-55, F

@hartfire That makes sense coz my fam is defy dysfunctional

LilPrincess · 41-45, F

I wonder this a lot. Im the baby of the family. My oldest brother was 18 years older than me, my sister is 17 years older than me and my other brother is 12 years older.

My oldest brother and I finally got close 4 months before he died. After Christmas my sister announced she has cancer. We are slowly getting closer. My other brother and i were the closest and now don't even talk.