I could say my hobbie is smoking marijuana but it's more of a lifestyle

I used to hate weed. I would smoke with others and be the quiet caca in the room. It wasn't because I was off in day dream land but because I was self conscious and could almost hear the bad whispers of me. It sucked ass
So I hated it. I despised it. I hated that I couldn't be ok.
One day my mom left on vacation and decided to smoke alone.
Best decision of my life
When I smoked alone I guess you can say I trained myself with positive thoughts.
It instantly became a remedy, a to go to when I felt sad.
It was amazing,
I smoke everyday. I'm not high all day nor do I smoke copious amounts. A bowl or two a day does the job.
It makes me feel so connected with myself. I have this inner positive voice and it's what I aspire to be. It's an amazing feeling.
I used to go high to school. I would finish everything first. I would be on my A game. When I do chores i clean every little spot. I enjoy it. It makes everything enjoyable.
It's funny that this "dangerous drug" can make you feel like you can do anything